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Should I Forget about him, or was he the one that got away?

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  • January 26, 2026 at 5:48 pm #454596
    anita
    Participant

    Dear Emma:

    I need to re-read your long post of about 6 hours ago tomorrow morning (when I have use of a 🖥.) For now, after first reading: how lovely it was in the beginning. It made me smile to read how comfortable you felt with each other.

    Trouble started, if I understand correctly, over the key 🔑 issue. That triggered his jealousy and insecurity.

    Seems like you told him about it because you were confused maybe, you wanted to be 100% honest with him..? You meant well, or at the least, you definitely didn’t intend to hurt W. You didn’t think thoroughly about it.

    Having read about his words and behaviors, seems to me that it was just a matter of time before there’d be problems, even without the key 🔑 issue.

    Maybe it’s about two individuals with trouble regulating emotions, getting confused and overreacting.

    The whole thing was a month long- enough time to Hope and Dream and Wish 🤞 but when emotions get too intense, anxiety, anger.. on both sides, what are the chances for a stable, long-term relationship?

    More tomorrow. If you get a chance to read this before I return- in about 14 hours from now- and would like to respond to my thoughts, or fill in blind spots I may have, please 🙏 do.

    🤍 🐕 🐈 Anita

    January 26, 2026 at 9:19 pm #454604
    J.
    Participant

    Hi Anita, thanks for reading and replying. What a cute name for your dog, I will look up the actor.
    Yes, about the key issue…i never meant to make him feel i was unsure if i wanted to be with him..cause i wasnt, i loved him deeply i just felt i needed to be honest, maybe too honest..
    He later said i maybe should not have told him. And kept telling me i should go date this colleague in a somewhat mean tone. I wish i didnt tell him. You said you expected there to be other issues if not for the key….why do you think? I am happy you said so..
    He did get very angry already when he felt excluded from a family feast. He said he wanted a stable relationship and me using the wrong words to describe emotions and his insecurity might be a toxic cocktail he said. I am just so sad what other woman will be able to make him happy..? Someone less emotional? and he said i might need a more secure man “not a loser like him”.

    January 26, 2026 at 9:30 pm #454608
    J.
    Participant

    He said, you knew about my ex, and that i broke up with her bc she lived with this guyvshe kissed, i was not welcome at her place, and she walkef around half naked…he compared this with the key issue. He later told me, that he believed i must have developed feelings for my colleague bc he is thinner than W, and he gained some weight while we were together. This was sooo untrue…my feelongs for this colleague never changef and i hardly noticed him gaining a few kilos. He said he wanted to only date chubby girls for the moment, but when he,’d lost weight he would date me. Cause i would find him more attractive then, he said….he made up the whole story, i prefer a sturdy guy over a very thin one

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