I’ve dealt with mental health issues for many years and made a quick decision a couple of years ago to pursue my current studies. I already have a degree but could not find stable work at the time. It’s 2 years later with about 2 more years to go and I’m thinking of finally stopping because I realize I don’t believe in myself, have zero self confidence (in general) and that my mental health issues seem to be this wall I’m always running into. I’m constantly mentally overwhelmed and have had anxiety about it for over a year now.

This is also a program that you have to be fairly exceptional (it’s competitive) to really get to the end and I’m messing up all over the place. I’m worried about wasting more time and money on this and I’m thinking of taking a break (while doing other work), focusing on getting help for my personal and mental health issues and going back to this sometime in the future. Annoyingly, I go through cycles of feeling capable and then mentally falling apart and screwing up badly so I’m constantly flip-flopping about what to do.

Through all this though, I have this feeling in my gut that this is good for me and I should continue and I am someone that has quit things throughout my life. I do not want to dissapoint my parents and loved ones. My parents especially as they have loaned me money for this and are always worried about me doing well in life. But I also have to face the reality of where I am mentally and if I’ll be able to succeed at this long term. And yes I failed the A & R in the SMART goal portion. I just have no clue what to do and need some advice…thank you 🙂