So my ex and I of 3.5 years broke up 3 months ago. We both needed time and space away from each other, the relationship became too much, too overwhelming and we were both dissatisfied and resentful of one another. We became a bit co-dependent, lost our own identities a bit. I became too smothering, while he became distant. We lost sight of what was truly important, we got very caught up in the stresses of todays world, and oftentimes let that run the relationship. We ended things the best way I have ever ended a relationship before though, we both agreed it was best for right now to separate and find discover our own identities again. We had a month of no contact, then were forced to see each other again as we are in the same friends group and after that we slowly began reconnecting. We talk a few times a week and have made plans about once a week now. I am trying to figure out what I want from this, and if he is the right person for me. I feel so confused, and I am getting emotionally involved to a point with him now that I am scared, I dont want to be hurt by him again, but i also want an answer as to where this is going. I know my feelings for him never went away and I just dont know what is the right decision to make. I dont know what he wants out of this either, nor does he really know what he wants. When I have tried to discuss it, neither of us come up with a solution that we are satisfied with. Neither of us wants to see the other person leave, but we both also agree we are not necessarily ready to be back together, we both still need time to care for ourselves. Its very hard because ending things does not mean not having to see him. Unfortunately we live in the same city, have the same friends, do the same activities, so eventually we are bound to run into each other. I miss him a lot, we have had only very enjoyable times post-breakup, he is showing he is trying, he has taken me out for lunch and dinner several times after breaking up. I just am finding it hard to openly communicate with him because i am scared of being hurt. I am also trying to take things slow and live in the moment and just enjoy life as it comes not plan too far ahead, i dont want to rush back into anything if we will ultimately be together, but I also dont know if i should be pressing him for an answer about what we are or what is going on when i know he doesnt have the answer and i dont even know what I want. This is so confusing…has anyone been in a similar situation? help.