I’m so sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. I know exactly what it’s like to feel like the only one who hasn’t got their life together. It’s so difficult to try to work everything out when it feels like life is speeding past you and everyone but you can keep up with the pace.
What’s been helping me is to step back, breathe in and try to realise that everyone has these fears at one point or another – it certainly doesn’t make you or I any less as a person.
I also try to think back to all of the times I’ve struggled in my life. They do seem to pale in comparison to the struggles I’m currently facing but they all have one thing in common – they ended. Some times it took a long time, often it happened without me realising but I (and you!) will make it out the other side and be better off for it.
Keep in mind that life changes in an instant which can be both good and bad. Try to be at peace with your present situation by knowing that it won’t last forever and the feelings you have now (inadequacy, confusion, fear) are just ‘visitors’. Life is what it is and sometimes that can be a bitter pill to swallow but once you accept that you give yourself permission to own it you won’t feel the same powerlessness.
It’s definitely easier said than done but by doing little things each day you can reframe your mind. If you have negative thoughts, recognise they are there but don’t entertain them – just let them go. Try to stop the comparisons against others, it’s great to be inspired by others but when you use their successes as evidence of your ~failures~ it negatively effects your self-worth. Most importantly, just remember to breathe. If you’re anxious it’s so hard to see things clearly. Inhale and exhale deeply and remind yourself that you don’t need the answers because they probably don’t exist anyway.
Wishing you luck and remember you’re definitely not alone in how you feel.