August 2, 2013 at 9:55 am #39601
I’m dealing with the question today of why he couldn’t forgive me in the relationship, but yet he forgive me in the healing process… It doesn’t make sense to me.August 2, 2013 at 10:50 am #39603HurtoneParticipant
I m not sure what your circumstances, but I hope this helps you, I recently found this article on forgiveness and I m dealing with my own heartache and trying to forgive the person who caused it, and trying to move on;
Forgiveness is Power!
Forgiveness literally means “to give forth”. In other words, forgiveness is the act of returning foreign energy, from out of your personal space. Forgiveness is a psychic mechanical action to “give it back” to them from whom it came.
Forgiveness is the single biggest gift one can ever give to oneself.
Forgiveness will release one from the psychic and emotional bondage that keeps one imprisoned in bitterness, resentment, anger, grief, and guilt.
Forgiveness is the key to creativity, energy, and freedom.
Forgiveness does not mean condoning or justifying the harmful acts done by others.
The laws of karma ensure that those who do harm will themselves be harmed, when their time comes. An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, the basic tribal rules of social justice, apply in some version in all cultures.
We can have faith that justice will be done. However the timing of redress is usually beyond any one individual’s control, and the karmic system allows delayed paybacks – sometimes many lifetimes down the road.”
may god help you…!August 2, 2013 at 11:07 am #39605SaraParticipant
I think forgiveness is such a hard concept. If you really sit down and think about “what is forgiveness” or “how have I forgiven people in the past”, can one really put an instruction sheet together on how it was done successfully? I haven’t been able to write instructions on it myself, and I have found that it is a continous process. I can feel one day that I have really forgiven a person or situation whereas the following day I then have some resentment of hurt creep up. It is ongoing.
In response to your question, I just have a concept for you to think about. In my opinion, forgiveness has so much to do with the act of letting go. Letting go of the emotions, the perceptions, the cause, and the effect of an offensive situation. When we are in the situation, in this case the relationship, perhaps he was unable to forgive you because he was not able to let go of everything attached to the situation that needed forgiveness. Now that he is out of the relationship and has had some breathing room, the space offered him some clarity as well as the natural process of detaching and letting go of the relationship and situations associated with it. It feels nearly impossible in the moment of offense to forgive. And I know it hurts so bad when it feels like one’s partner could not give fogiveness a chance while in the relationship in an effort to try and make the relationship work. The human process is exactly that, a process. If you are anything like me, I would encourage you to try not to be too hard on yourself and work to forgive yourself for any wrongs or need for improvement in your half of the relationship. Try to give the situation up to a higher power, whomever that is for you. It has a bigger plan for you.August 2, 2013 at 1:46 pm #39625
Thank you Hurtone and Sara. Both of the different answers shed some light upon my reflecting. Much appreciated, xoAugust 2, 2013 at 9:38 pm #39658
So tonight I went to a First Friday food truck night by myself, I don’t have that many friends so I do a lot on my own. I was fine at first, but grew to be very anxious. It hit me that the world is huge and that I could take any path in life. Instead of being excited about it, I got anxious and worried so I decided to leave. It was also very crowded. Maybe it was too much too soon?? I rode my bike there and told myself the feeling of nervousness would pass. I forced myself to stop at a bar on my way home for a beer. That was my night, but still pondering the epiphany about about the huge world, the endless ppl and many paths I can choose from. It’s almost overwhelming to fathom since my world has been my ex. Thoughts?July 21, 2020 at 9:18 am #362279Canadian EagleParticipant
Did life end up exciting you …. it has so much to offer