December 11, 2013 at 9:30 pm #46618EllieParticipant
lately as my life has been progressing into the young adult phase, the idea of relationships, not just romantic ones, has been on my mind. I very much believe that your own happiness comes from within, and not to depend purely on things or people around you, but what I’ve been starting to wonder is: does everything happen for a reason? the people you meet in life, are they meant to cross your path? do you think that it realistic to believe that as long as you are following your heart and choosing to be who and do what you want, will the right person come along? i am curious to hear your thoughtful insight, even any past experiences/ stories related to the possibility of “fate”. please don’t interpret this as me needing advice. this is a general question for everybody and i would really love to know what you think!
December 12, 2013 at 3:57 am #46626MelissaParticipant
- This topic was modified 6 years, 8 months ago by Ellie.
I believe that every person you have a relationship with is predetermined and offers a lesson to us. If I’ve been in a bad relationship I’ve decided that it was meant to be and take away any lessons I have learned from it. It makes it easier to move on. I also believe that the happier you are within yourself; the greater love you have for yourself; the more attractive you are to others.
I spend a considerable time in my adult life being miserable and feeling lonely. I was ‘stuck’ in a materially comfortable but emotional unrewarding relationship. I had few friends and I became overweight and a nightmare to be around. A good friend from my distant past saw I was unhappy and told me I didn’t have to be like this; I could and will be happy once I put things into action. I moved on and became so happy with my choice I was totally proud of myself for having the strength to leave a boring and unfulfilling life for a more creative and social one. In my life I am number one. If I can’t take care of myself, I can’t take care of my fiends and family and they need me.
I was destined to experience every down in my relationship in order to give me the knowledge and strength to bring me up.
I’m 42 now and have had a succession of hideous relationships including with my parents and siblings. Look after yourself, understand that the people you relate with have problems of their own that they may take out on you. I’m just out of a sad relationship where the guy was abused as a kid, he felt he could blame me for being insensitive every time we had an argument. He’s finding his own way of healing and, heartbroken as I am, I cannot wait for him to heal as he was the centre of my world and I forgot to look after myself which weakened me and stopped me from being able to look after him and me. We both learned from our experience together and feel it best we move apart for the time being.
To summarise, I believe every person you meet is the right one.
I hope this makes sense to you and answers at least part of your question.
Blessins xxDecember 12, 2013 at 6:55 pm #46651EllieParticipant
Melissa- thanks for such a profoundly written reply. i am very grateful that you took the time to share with me your opinions and story! i love what you said about everybody you meet offering a lesson. that is such a great way to look at it. and i am glad for you that you were able to break away from your earlier life that you were unhappy in- NOBODY deserves to live unhappily or unsatisfied. good for you for taking the initiative and following your heart. and thats great your friend was able to help. ” I also believe that the happier you are within yourself; the greater love you have for yourself; the more attractive you are to others.” this part was so beautifully put! very very true! your words were inspiring to me and you definitely answered my question