fbpx
Menu

Trying to find strength in pain

Home→Forums→Emotional Mastery→Trying to find strength in pain

New Reply
Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • June 22, 2015 at 2:30 pm #78675
    Jamie Shipman
    Participant

    Hi Tiny Buddha family,

    I wanted to reach out today because I am lost and don’t know what I should do. I was recently dating a guy and he seemed as if he wanted a relationship and to be with me, but he ended up doing a bait and switch at the end of the first month. It has been unstable on and off for 4 months. Today he told me that he still had strong feelings for his ex and has tried everything he can to forget her, but can’t and he said that he would always have these feelings and that’s why it is tough for him to date. I don’t understand why he wasn’t up front in the beginning. This hurts a lot and I don’t know why I always become someone’s second. My ex before me still loved his ex and the entire time we were together he still loved her. I stayed alone for years because I can’t trust anybody and I couldn’t feel anything. I just feel dead inside all over again. I don’t know how to reply to him. It hurts. I don’t know what I do to deserve this. Any help in replying and ending this is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much!

    June 22, 2015 at 4:22 pm #78680
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jamie Shipman:
    I am sorry you have this bad luck to have been with two men who told you that they still loved their exes while being with you. It sucks when it happened once and more so when it happened again. You wrote that you “always become someone’s second.” Has it happened with more than the two men you mentioned? Has it been so for you as a child, being second to a sibling? Or with girlfriends being second to their other friends? I wonder what you mean by “always.” That can help me give you input that maybe can be helpful, I hope.
    anita

    June 22, 2015 at 6:57 pm #78688
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Four months? I would have left in 90 days. Don’t pay them attention, don’t reply unless you feel the need to let him know how upset you are, then move on. Try not to take it personally, as hard as that sounds, but the people who wronged you have issues, not you.

    July 4, 2015 at 7:28 pm #79261
    ferdi
    Participant

    jamie,im sorry to hear what had ahppen to u but i think u just giving ur x lots of attention,try to overcome it by goin to enjoy urself,,take care of urself by strting to go to gym 2 a week..meeting alot of people makes u feel better and increase to self confidence,,try to be happy most of the time be positive in life,,,ive been there lots of times,,feel worse than u,,and i still managed to survive,now im just focusing my mind to the grat things i made not on bad things ive made before,dnt dwell on it..relax and go on im sure u can move on,,with the help of prayer,its a great way of relaxing ur mind,,hope u feel better soon,ur friend ferdi

    July 10, 2015 at 2:08 pm #79632
    Jamie Shipman
    Participant

    I should have left much sooner. It has been two weeks since this happened and I haven’t talked to him since, but today it popped up in my head again and I was doing so well too, but it hurts all over again and I wanted to reach out. I’m glad I came back here. I have been trying to occupy my mind with the advice given. -Now I just see more and more is unraveling and you know I just wish people could love and care more about others and not use and hurt people. I know most wish that, but good people shouldn’t be used and even bad people. I always end up blaming myself and never can forgive myself. It’s easy for me to forgive others. Thank you all for being there for me and giving advice. I’ll be okay one day.

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 5 posts - 1 through 5 (of 5 total)

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Please log in OR register.