Hi,
I’ll start at the beginning, although this touches on some difficult subjects.

I’m 51 years old, and well, the beginning began with me sexually starting to develop at 8 years old. A real shock in the quite conservative 70s by many a respect… when you don’t even know what masturbating is, and then you ejaculate, which to be honest, traumatised me on some level.

The girls at school, well one way or another they find out you are sexually developed and many were really sexually predatorial towards me. Of the countless girls who approached me extremely sexually, few, I can only think of one, perhaps two who approached me for the right reasons.

A lot of experiences I had, would certainly be considered assault. But when it comes to men’s feelings and women’s feelings in our society… men’s come a very poor second.

I’ll give yourselves a few examples I have had with women in just the last few years:

I was semi homeless 6 years ago, and I was staying in a B&B. The lady in the room next to me was very nice, and foreign, which probably explains why she was so nice, but then she moved a new English woman moved in, and straight away she was trying to undermine with everything I did.

Then when I defended myself, she would accuse me of harassing her. The chap who ran the homeless B&B was a Muslim, and fortunately we got on quite well, but so what this lady although she smoked like a chimney, and involved herself in various other activities. She feigned that she was so upset by me at one point, she turned up in full Burka. It was touch and go as to whether I would be thrown.

Time came when she was leaving, and the night before she was leaving… she comes into my bedroom and 1.30am scantily clad and makes a pass at me.

Some years earlier, when I lived in Thornhill Dumfries, there was a particular nice pub I used to like going to, and got on well with the family he ran it. Unfortunately, they left and a new family took over.

I’m a runner, and a writer, and I ran in the first time on meeting this family. And there was a slightly chubby girl and chap, but straight away this girl starts hitting on me. After so many experiences like this, I was worried, and enquired further with other people if the chap she was her boyfriend or not… sure enough he was. So why was she flirting with me so outrageously? When I didn’t take any notice of her, she what would be described as ‘sexually harassed me if I was a woman’ but because I’m a man… you can tell I’m angry? She would follow me around the pub, and when I set up my work for my writing with laptop, she would make on excuse after another as to why I could not do that.

She kept on bullying me, until eventually she just banned me from the bar.

Additionally, just around the corner was another café I liked going to. I knew all the names of girls there, and they were friendly and down to earth, but one girl who was offhand to be honest full of herself, I was dubious about speaking to and never got to know her name. To cut a long story short, she made out a situation to be not what it was, and called the police… I was only warned, but the point is I’ve seen this behaviour time and time again.

Another example. I used to live in Bradford, and visited a writing group, which was all women. The lady who ran this, every week would make a statement towards me in front of the group, which conveyed again as ‘sexually harassment.’ I finally got fed up with the situation and emailed her one night, and I was ‘not’ being threatening or abusive, but spoke of my feelings. I could have perhaps been less forthright, as I had some wine (please don’t use this as an excuse for dismissing my feelings) but I was intimidated by the situation. I stated in the email I was thinking of not going any more.

She called the police, and ‘completely’ turned things around, and I had again the police warning me. Fortunately, I could show them the email I sent. Not only that, but the library I used to visit, she told her colleague an entirely different reality, and then they took me aside and in effect bullied me.

I’ve had up to 3 female landladies, and ‘every’ one of them has made a pass at me, and worse when you don’t reciprocate it has either led directly or indirectly to being evicted.

I could give you ‘countless’ more examples such as this, in which if I was a woman it would be ‘rightly’ unacceptable for me… or anyone to be treat this way.

To top it all off, I had a female neighbour – a couple next door. And I tried to improve the environment, and this woman… well there was a point when I found myself getting on well with her husband, and how similar we were in our humour, but at that point I felt she took more notice in me than I would like and in the wrong way.

She became bullying, vindictive, falsely accusing me of various things… she lied, pushed, she undermined what I was trying to do for the community. I could go on… but I’m so tired of talking about this, and deeply upset and traumatised by it. Twice, I stopped eating for 5 days at a time, until on both occasions I nearly passed out, and felt it wise to start eating again. I wished to make a statement and when no one is listening?

She got the police involved time and again. The police even warned me as much as they could that this lady ‘couple’ were contriving to get me arrested, but then 3 months later the police did arrest me, and it was a slippery slope down from there. I was charged with stalking… bearing in mind one of the instances which contributed towards this, was when (I happen to be particularly observant, which should be an advantage but when you notice things others do, and comment – they often don’t like that) she dropped her banking card, when she was walking down the other side of the street, and even after the 3 years of bullying I ran after her and gave her this bank. She did not thank me in the slightest, and just snatched the card from me.

I refused to accept the judges verdict, and as a result he sent me to Saughton Prison, where I was on hunger strike for 16 days… I often wish I had more courage to see this through. It seems to me, that things are ‘so very bad’ that unless a man in my situation were prepared to die… then I do not know how things will change? A bit dramatic, but after years of abuse, from many women, and even when you try to defend yourself you are blamed… well, where do you go from there?

Over the last few years, I’ve contacted my local MPs office, about various issues “never” anything for myself, but issues for the community and even a homeless man with mental health issues I was very concerned about. This MP was really not interested and bullying and intimidating… she even then got a younger girl who worked for her to go along with her line. She ‘abused’ her power, and had the police arrest me, and in the police’s defence they were really quite good, they entirely disagreed with what happened and supported me, but it didn’t stop me spending ‘2’ different night in the cells.

The charges were eventually dropped.

But, sorry… women, and not all women, but it does seem most or almost most, in such as Britain have just lost their way, and lost their way badly?

I often try to speak to women on issues such as the Suffragettes who made their sacrifices for ‘all’ of us, not just women… for a better life, and a very large proportion of women just seemingly do not care.

Then, you see such as Olga Minsk who defied riot police in Russia and read their country’s constitution and right to protest at just 17… only to be carried away by ‘agents’ later on leaving.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-49243745

Then here, many women who are considerably older, cry harassment at the slightest criticism… it is just plain wrong!

Men and women should be able to criticise each other equally… that’s how we get the best from each other.

Yes, it stings, that I had not have a remotely intimate relationship for over 20 years because of my experiences, and now I’d be worried about performing in any case, after so much abuse and intimidation from women. Intimidation and bullying towards men, which society not only does not recognise… but actually in my case, blames the ‘men’ for.

I’d “highly” recommending watching these videos, ‘all’ of which are presented by women, which I think will change your mind if you are open to the ‘real’ difficulties out there. Please forgive me, these are in the form of tweets I send on the subject:

Sexual equality, which in reality is intended for the benefit of “both” women ‘and’ men.

There are huge misconceptions society operates under, which I don’t believe are fair for either sex.

MEETING THE ENEMY A feminist comes to terms with the Men’s Rights movement | Cassie Jaye | TEDxMarin – YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WMuzhQXJoY&ab_channel=TEDxTalks

There is a ‘balance’ which must be sought… presently men are at times terribly dealt with by the law. False allegations in #India have led to the suicide and deaths of at least “3” men.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_2gl7lz25E&ab_channel=TEDxTalks

A 16yr old boy ended his life in Bilaspur. He was sexually exploited by his Chemistry teacher – an adult woman. In his suicide note he says he’s doing this because otherwise no one will “believe him”

We cannot #BelieveAllWomen… this is not Equality?

https://www.newindianexpress.com/nation/2021/mar/24/accusing-teacher-of-harassment-boy-dies-by-suicide-in-chhattisgarh-2280927.html

In 2012 cases of gang rape in India rightly caused a national outcry. However, this led to laws which largely now “blindly” believe all women.

As in UK & other countries, ‘imbalance’ is leading to further injustices:

If you are considering someone guilty or innocent based solely on their gender?

Then you are making assumptions based on a person’s gender and sex.

Simply put, you are practising sexism!

I find it very worrying that #men are being treated as if ‘they’ are the problem… when the “real” problem is we have a system which is open to abuse & does not deal with insistences of injustices fairly, whether they are #men or #women?

https://youtube.com/watch?v=3WMuzhQXJoY&ab_channel=TEDxTalks…

*I also wrote this article on a number of my experiences going back some years:

Sexual ‘Un…’ Equality?

Just to conclude, as a guy I just do not feel safe, or rather “safe to be the person I want to be…” the best of me!

That’s not just detrimental to me, but also so all of us.

We should be encouraging people to reach their full potential!

Unfortunately, what I believe has happened is that, while in the past, women were seen as less than men, now in the truly important things – such as feelings are relationships – in Britain at least, men are often seen as less.

Once more, this is to the benefit of neither men nor women.