Anita I just struggle so much to know what steps to take. I also feel guilt because I wish I could make things work with the good guy and try to push through the anxiety when we are together, but I just dont feel strong enough to do that. Do you think thats avoidance? I dont want to avoid the relationship it just seems like it has already been 10 months of me having break downs and I dont think I can handle them anymore.
I was thinking taking time from the relationship and continuing therapy is my initial plan. Maybe the next step will come to me then.
You can put together a Healing Plan (HP) today by deciding on a daily routine that works for you. I suggest a fast 30 minute walk outdoors once a day; a second walk when especially distressed, plus a guided meditation first thing in the morning and one before bed- start with these two items (It beats analysis-paralysis, otherwise known as over thinking while doing nothing)!
In therapy, you and your therapist should be working together on a HP for you, monitoring your execution of the plan, adjusting it as needed, and evaluating your progress over time.