Hi Anita

i think you’re right about him giving me space and yesterday I was unable to think straight. It’s hard to explain or give an example of how he speaks to me. It’s like I’m a colleague and he is right and my opinion isn’t unless he asks for it of course. Small example but it really hurt….I’m an ultra distance runner so no quite a bit about exercise therefor when my husband is having a pain in leg which I know how to solve them I try to help him. Doesn’t want to know….fine!! We are at the gym and he’s doing squats in which I suggested before and he never did so why now? I ask him in which he says his brother told him it would help his leg!!! My response was “you don’t listen to a word I say do you?” He says “no”….really upset me because that summed it up. He has cut me down in front of friends to make me look stupid but I told him if he does that again then I will leave. I would always have his back especially if we are in public but it doesn’t seem the same for me. I know reading this then it sounds trivial but over years of someone chipping away at you….it no longer feels trivial. We had marriage counselling last year and he admitted that he doesn’t want idle chit chat and he likes to choose when to talk to me. He is now becoming a bully as well as controlling. I love him and I know he loves me but I wonder if it’s enough as there doesn’t appear to be respect. When he’s happy and in a good mood then he makes me happy but that is a rarity these days. Maybe I’m needy who knows but We all can be. Just found myself in a deep hole with no one to talk to .  Like you said I don’t have it all but everybody thinks I do and my husband is amazing and funny etc etc etc