Will my abusive mom ever change?

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    Thank you Anita. Although I don’t plan on having children, I’ll be wary of who I start my future with. I also started counseling for at my school. I’m taking small steps to better myself. I will NEVER end up like my mom. Never will I abuse anyone, regardless of how I feel.


    Dear pikachumew2:

    It is a pleasure to read your post above- you are my hero!



    Hi Pikachumew2 – I’m relieved and proud to hear you say you are seeking counseling at your school. I’m an abuse survivor too and I know how terrifying it can be to get help when you’ve been coerced into secrets and silence for so long. I’d strongly recommend asking your counselor to give you referrals to legal resources too. I’m sure that in the process of helping yourself, the welfare of your brother and father weighs heavily on your mind. You may be able to meet with someone to just talk about your legal rights and hypothetically how your brother could be removed from her care, without having to make an immediate decision. For example, CASA workers (court appointed special advocate) are often appointed to minors as legal advocates to help them through the legal process of revealing abuse and neglect. http://www.casaforchildren.org/site/c.mtJSJ7MPIsE/b.5301295/k.BE9A/Home.htm

    Older siblings are often terrified that their siblings will end up in foster care. A CASA worker is supposed to be assigned to a case until it is closed, meaning that even if a child is put in foster care, the same CASA worker will remain assigned to them throughout their stay.

    I don’t know enough to help more than that, but I do know that there are people out there who want to help. If you have fears about what would happen to your family members if you reported your brother’s abuse or tried to gain custody of him, speak those fears to a social worker, therapist, or lawyer. Ask for explanations. Most people will respect your worries and work through it with you.

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