Lately I have been somewhat mean to my boyfriend for seemingly no reason at all. He is nothing short of amazing and I often find myself being argumentative, overly emotionally, and bratty while around him. I have been stressed out at work, am a long time survivor of depression (currently in therapy and on antidepressants), and am dealing with some family drama involving my father’s alcoholism and my sister’s speed addiction.

I am usually very good at assessing and keeping on top of my own emotions to deal with them in nondestructive ways, but recently it seems like I am unable to figure out how my current life stresses might be related to my bad behavior toward my boyfriend. I mean, I truly hope these are somehow connected because if not, that would mean that I am just really not my usual nice and fun self for no reason at all.

The worst part about my poor behavior is that every time I act out, the self hatred talk becomes very loud inside of my head. The narrative only makes me more emotional and perhaps less rational. It actually causes a great deal of anxiety, which is probably only making things worse.

My question is how to deal with this and stop behaving this way toward my boyfriend. I need some kind of plan to stop myself when I feel the bratty, nagging, negative thoughts inside my head so I don’t act on these and hurt my boyfriend. He is the one person who is my rock right now and if I push him away, I would be devastated.