Dear Jessica:

In each of the examples you gave, the other person was indeed dismissive of you, disrespectful, unfair and unkind.

One very significant problem standing in your way of asserting yourself with others and ending friendships with those who disrespect you is what you wrote in the beginning of your last post: “I feel like I always need to be nice to people or karma will happen. (I even feel like this if the person deserves to be told off).”- you fear punishment if you assert yourself. Fearing punishment is a strong motivation to not engage in behaviors that are likely to lead to punishment.

You wrote in this quote: “I feel like…” it is not only a feeling, it is a belief, a core belief. I believe this belief is untrue. I believe that your future will be better if you are assertive. Don’t you?

One more question: do you believe in an after life where you will be punished if you assert yourself for any reason?

anita