Dear abubin:

A bit about reality: you live in Malaysia, which you referred to as “an undeveloped country”. You are 45. Three years ago you lost all your savings in a failed business attempt. You are married with children  but have no love interest  in your wife.

Then this woman showed up in your life last year, a woman who lives  in Australia, a developed country, a woman with some financial means. She showed  up into your life with a story: like you, she was born in Malaysia, growing up close to you, being in love with you (you didn’t know) since she was a very young girl. She dreamed of you, believing you are her destiny, for thirty years she had this dream of  you. And then she appeared in your life and  the two of you met for the first time in adulthood September last year.

The two dreams met: her  dream of  a thirty years unmaterialized love story materializing and your dream of moving to a developed country and having a love relationship, passion.

And passion there was for the two of  you, for a little while. You exchanged rings in a private marriage-like (the two of  you, in reality, are  married to other people, with children). You talked about moving to New Zealand, it being easier than moving to Australia, and  living there with her.

In this short relationship with this woman, Debbie, there were quarrels from the very beginning and throughout. There really never was a  meeting-of-the-heart-and-minds. There were two dreams that didn’t come true, not for you, not for her.

And so, she  is back to her reality, an unsatisfying marriage in Australia and you are back to your reality, an unsatisfying marriage in Malaysia. And poor finances.

Now what, abubin?

anita