Hi John,

You know, the text messaging between you two is inconsistent with her not wanting you in her life. I can tell you that if I were completely done with an ex-boyfriend, I would not text him. Moreover, the text she sent you that said that no one has ever cared for her as much as you have is another indicator that there may still feelings there, in my opinion. Does she ever initiate the text messaging between you two, or is it always you? Regardless, she has certainly come a long way from the “Do not contact me or my friends/family again” statement to you. I guess the question is whether or not she wants to be more than friends.

Is she exclusive with this new guy she’s seeing? If so, that may be one reason why she doesn’t want to meet up with you. Or she may just need some time. I don’t know…I’m now thinking you may need to slow this down, be more patient, take a step back. You already sent the birthday card. She knows you’re thinking about her. If she’s starting to think about you again, I hope the letter you’re planning to send next week doesn’t make her bolt. The letter is going to require a response from her. From how you’ve described this situation, she doesn’t seem like the type of person who wants this kind of pressure. If she’s worth it, you may want to keep the text messaging going for a while, keep things light and fun, rebuild the relationship before sending the letter. Give her a chance to remember and miss the good stuff about the relationship.

I know that being in limbo is killing you but based on your last post, if she gets that letter next week, her response to you may not be what you are hoping for. If you’re at the point where, either way, you need to know where you stand with her right now, then send it, but be prepared to get some news that you don’t want.

Sorry.

B