Dear Anita,

I am  glad you will be away from the computer for the next few days, I hope you take the time to relax, enjoy the weather, and have fun.  What a treat it is to unplug.  An active, deliberate, and ever so enjoyable treat.

I spoke with a mentor today, that I connected with randomly – fate! We spoke for over an hour about the importance of boundaries in both work and personal life.  I don’t know too many details about her life of recent,and vice versa, but it appears based on general conversation that we both have had a great degree of soul searching over the last year or so, and have thus CHOSEN to lead, now, deliberate lives full of active positive choices.  How many keywords in that sentence, how many of those get thrown around these days, in books, articles, social media – without a blink of an eye.  Deliberate, positive, active choices, intention, live with purpose, and the list goes on.  These sorts of terms used to wash over me.  And many times they still do – if they are heard in mass communication, or from a source that does not seem authentic.  Just rambling.  However, when I speak of it of my own self, or of loved ones, and it comes from a place I trust – ME – I do absorb it.  Therefore, if I live it, and then I speak it – I trust it – more than I would if it came from someone else.  This is self trust – or at least the beginning of it.

Self trust in the sense that I can remind myself of these above terms, as they are actively finding a place in my life, in my day to day.  I practice what I preach, and so what I say to my own-self is trustworthy.  This may not be common in today’s world -and that’s a shame for those individuals.  However, over there, in my own world, I speak truth.

Sometimes, so much so that it leads to anxiety and even paranoia.  Anxiety may seem to one’s self as honesty.  An honest look at yourself and saying, well you may not know the whole picture..sure.  Well maybe it won’t work out and you’ll be disappointed…sure.  Well maybe you don’t have what it takes…sure.  Maybe if you try you’ll fail…sure.  These are all sures, maybes, perhaps.  These are not gospel.  They are what ifs.  They are anxiety.

If self trust  is to prevail, anxiety must be conquered.   Or at least begin to be looked at as something that is a hindrance.  Not the gospel, purely a hindrance.  A fallacy, a hurdle.

Self trust means going right to go home because intuitively you need the alone time.  Anxiety says, well if you skip out on this event you may regret  it.  Where to go – you’re at the crossroads..

Self trust is right.  Why? Because that is gospel.  It is the trust.  It is self protection.  The self knows what the self needs, if you let it.  If you trust it.

Now if every time you go with self trust, and don’t find success, and this and that – is it to be blamed.  No. Never.

Because first of all, what if you went with anxiety, to the left – do you truly think that you in that case would have instead found this “success” – I believe not.  In fact your road would have been a great degree more tumultuous and unpleasant.

If you go to the right, with the direction of self trust, you will always be true to yourself.  And if you are true to yourself, you are truly living, and what could be a greater purpose in life, than to truly live.