Dear  Jay:

I think I know what love means for you, what you individually need in a relationship because you wrote in your previous thread: “To tell you the truth, I just want that one person. An anchor. One that can keep me sane, that can understand the way I am and think nothing of it when I make a tiny blunder or do something really stupid. One that loves me for me”-

When you meet a woman,  pay attention and learn the following over time: is she very anxious, repeatedly irrational or is she sensible and  calm enough on an ongoing  basis; is she predictable that  way?

When you speak, does she listen? Does she respond to what you say in a way that indicates to you that she did listen to you empathetically and respectfully?

Is she critical of you, blaming and accusing you when you make a mistake, or is she okay with you making mistakes, letting you know that she too makes mistakes?

Does she tell you about what she admires about other men, comparing you to others, or does she  tell you what she likes about you?

Depending on the answers, this one woman may be that anchor that you need.

anita