Hi Anita,

Thought I’d check in! Things have been going extremely well I’m glad to say. I’ve done a huge amount of work with my therapist regarding the conflict with my brothers and how I might approach them regarding Mum and their lack of care and concern. They have an issue with Mum and I because Mum wouldn’t take my middle brother in last year when he had a bout of depression.

Mum did not reject my brother as he seems to think, he needed professional help and guidance, her main concern was myself given the amount of stress I’ve been under since Mum’s brain injury four years ago and the mountains I’ve had to climb to get Mum stable and semi independent.

The problem is my siblings have no insight and base everything around assumptions all of which are untrue (we don’t care about my brother and so forth, all lies), anyway I guess what I am trying to say is that my therapist has helped me take back my power from my older brother who can be extremely difficult, his MO is passive aggressive, he hasn’t got the emotional intelligence to actually confront that which is causing him to feel angry and frustrated. So the next time we meet I won’t feel anxious and I will be able to deal with him on my terms. It’s amazing how easy it is when you shift the balance of power back to yourself. I’m in charge and I know what’s what.

It will be interesting to see where this is all heading but from my perspective I feel buoyant and confident, occasionally that pesky doubting Thomas creeps in but he is swiftly batted away! In other news I have actually contacted an immigration lawyer in the USA, I understand that a few weeks ago I was in the ‘flight’ response but now I am able to look at everything with a clear head and my heart is with America. IF I take the plunge it won’t be for at least two years and Mum hasn’t voiced any objections, she wants me to spread my wings but at the same time if I move I will make absolutely certain that she is safe and well looked after.

I’m pressing ahead with my plans to renovate the garden, as soon as Winter is out of the way work will begin in earnest!

I hope all is well.