Dear Lindsey:

It is very important that you decide ahead of time what limits you will enforce when in his company, and plan what to do in different scenarios. It is a good thing you brought up the scenario of him trying to kiss you.

If he does, be firm, meaning say what you will say in a confident, strong voice, not aggressively, not loud, but firm and strong. Say something like what you suggested above. Developed a bit: I am not interested in messing around casually. At this point we are casually spending time together, we are not dating. Kissing, for me, is part of dating, not of casually spending time together.

If he does not respect that, my goodness, that will indicate that K is not  worthy of your time, that will be too bad. If he respects it, then enjoy the time with him. If he later tries to kiss you again (I hope not!) ask him if he remembers what you told him earlier and wait for his answer.

If a man… forgets a woman’s assertion of no kissing/ sex and tries again, it doesn’t mean the woman should forget her own assertion as well! It means he gets at best one more reminder before game over.

anita