* adding: you handled her aggression this Christmas very well, excellent job with that “okay” response, and with telling your mother in law that she has other plans and is fine. Problem is her aggression is still there and will wear you down. And when you get worn down, nine more toes are in danger of injury. It is not a recorded statistic but I have no doubt that many people die al over the world,  every day, as a result of family members’ passive aggression.

anita