what did you feel, I wonder.

I sadly can’t explain it, but if i remember correctly, i had this before many times, but it was more extreme, i remember one night (it usually comes when im sleeping) i woke up in the middle of the night, and i had it, i felt so weaken, so light, like im not in control, yet so rested, it was both good and bad, but i kinda like it, today i also had it, but i was dreaming and it was less extreme

then I must respect your desire to not change. If I try to change you in any way, then I am disrespecting you.

I never thought about that in this way, yes i (think) that’s true, i think that when someone tries i feel disrespected

suffering was not as bad or unique as yours

No i actually don’t think that it was my suffering that’s unique, but more likely my way of handling this suffering and my genetic, i also should say that i have a friend (by friend here i mean someone i talk to) he has kinda the same thinking, im only what i was created, nothing more nothing less, he also has GAD, and when i told him that this is a thing (he didn’t know) and told him about the cure (medication or lifestyle changing) he told me “forget it, im gonna suffer from this until i die, and it ruins everything for me”, i think that the result of me (end up with a desire to create my own philosophy and values and beliefs) is what made me unique, not the suffering, and i say unique based on the evidence i see

your suffering has been so unique/ abnormal that it has led to your unique/ abnormal extent of apathy and desire to not change.

The reason why i don’t like when they compare is because the present of me, the person right here, has tried everything they said without any benefit, and i hated it so much, everything that benefitted them didn’t do anything for me (e.x walking for a whole year made no difference to my mentality or added anything to my life) by difference i don’t expect happiness, but from what the people say, it actually matters to do, for me i see that if i did it and didn’t do it, its the same, the only difference is the long term benefits,  and the thinking that it helps (placebo effect).

ask people for help and engage in discussions with them when the result frustrates you and makes you feel guilty

Cause i have the hope that i would find people that understand my point and accept it, long shot but still i had to try, also in my first post here i was bored and sleepy, and i thought that my post gonna shock people (i like when i imagine thier pov lol), i also never asked for help, i seem like a guy with a problem, but im not really (by that i mean that the problem has no fix, so its not a problem by definition)

I was thinking about her. I think that she deserve a thank you from you, for meaning well and for posting to you with zero arrogance

Her post was rude to me, she said “i was suicidal and depressed for a long time” she disregard my argument as depression, and assumed that my life looked like her life once, and that this and that helped her, she was very respectful in what she said, and she meant well, but does she deserve a thank you? No, i don’t think anyone deserves anything, now i don’t blame her for her replay, i understand that this is how she was bulit, and im just not like that, but i won’t say thank you without actually meaning it, at least not online, when i can not say that, unless it matters to you, then i can flix my values

 I could tell by her post that she spent a good amount of time and effort so to make her post clear and thorough.

I understand that, and i appreciate people like her, very nice and well intentioned people, actually i love people like that, makes me warm.