Javier,

Even though it’s all awful right now, I am so thankful you are alive and not in a vegetative state.

I’m still proud of you for coming to this forum and self-advocating even when you feel like you are nothing. Again, you are not alone.

I am hoping this gives you perspective to never attempt again, especially knowing the risks of what it will do to your family, yourself and the world losing your spark.

If you can regain composure and think of wisdom from this experience for later, you can help countless souls who are going through the same things.

I too have had suicidal ideations and one almost attempt in high school. Life is unfair sometimes and just awful. It’s not your fault that you are feeling this way. So many are.

My only advice is self-compassion. You are soooo hard on yourself (and your family doesn’t help that). It’s okay to love yourself through this. It’s okay to see your goodness. It’s okay to see your potential. It’s okay to live life again and have hope again and know this is a second chance.

I’m proud of you even though it’s been this hard.

You are going to make it.

Sometimes, you will feel like this again. It might come back. I want you to tell someone if it does. I want you to go to the psych ward if you are tempted again.

In the meantime, cry. Feel. Heal. Be. Surrender. Love yourself.

You are not your circumstances. You are your character.

You are enough, even though you think are nothing.

You are someone. I care very much about the next chapter of your life, that you find stability. I was so worried when I didn’t hear from you for some time. I knew something happened, I just knew it. Thank you for coming back to us.

I’m so glad you’re here.

Sarah