Dear Tineoidea,

Plenty actually, and in fact she was a first-hand witness of his poor behavior and character, hell, she herself suffered from it. She knows that he caused me many troubles in the past. … I did warn her many times, she herself said that he does appear to be possessive when the whole circus began.

I am sorry to say this, but she reminds me of you, Tineoidea. This is what you said about her disregarding his abuse and going back for more:

I was intent on cutting him off since he simply refused to reason, apologize and own up, instead he kept doubling up on his abuse of her and made me lose more and more trust in him. Meanwhile, she kept wanting for things to work out, didn’t want me to lose an old friend, and so I kept trying to mediate.
The absurd thing here is that despite her being very aware of the situation and constantly voicing that interacting with him does her no good and that she should stop, she still kept doing it on and off, coming back bruised and in tears every time.

This sounds exactly like what you’ve been doing in your friendship with his guy: disregarding the abuse and always going back to him, for the sake of loyalty. You didn’t want to lose an old friend, and she too didn’t want you to lose an old friend. She echoed your attitude, but then took it to the extreme, where she lost the sense of reality. You at least know you’re not the bad guy, you know who you are. But she doesn’t, remember? (“I don’t know myself”)

He couldn’t fool you into thinking that you are a bad friend and a bad person (although he tried to). But he could fool her. It’s not entirely your fault, because it was her who chose to go back for more, but you sort of opened the door, you allowed this guy to be your friend and be a part of your realm (and even your intimate relationship with your girlfriend) and ruin things.

In a previous post, you weren’t sure if you should “salvage the relationship”. Well, I hope you see why you shouldn’t, ever, unless he changes radically.