I still have high hopes for her. I think she will get back to me once she reads my letter and poem. If she doesn’t then I will have my answer and I wont continue to chase someone that is running away. I don’t think ill mention to her about being disrespected and her doing that is wrong in my eyes, it will just push her away even more and make me look too attached, emotional and that I am struggling without her. I will simply leave her with the letter and poem as my final words. I think this would leave a better memory for her and cause less resent. But if she doesn’t want my help even as a friend then there isn’t anything I can do besides better myself. Maybe one day she reaches out but I won’t jump to conclusions just yet. Do you think this is wise? I will obviously be coming back here once I know she has 100% received my letter and let you know what her response was if I do get one.

She almost did seem like she had dual personalities at times. One that was so bubbly and comforting but on the odd occasion she would completely shut off or turned on me. She was jobless most this year, I remember about a week before we split I encouraged her to find work. She told me ‘don’t tell me what to do, I know I need too’.  I told her I know you’re having a bad day and I’m only trying to help. She told me ‘I can help myself, talk later’. (This is all over text). Later that day she apologized and said ‘I know your only trying to help. let me know when you’re free’. I went over and she mentioned she had feelings of leaving again, however she didn’t leave so I congratulated her for beating that feeling. In this moment she was happy. However the very next day she messaged again saying she was feeling flat, I told her you should be proud of yourself, you’re doing great, you can come over too mine anytime! She replied ‘I want to stay at home and I know you rather be alone at your place, you said you’d be there for me not just because I ask but because you want too’. I told her she was putting it back onto me and she didn’t like that so there was a tiny misunderstanding. We both agreed we weren’t looking for a fight, I ended up going over to hers. She apologized sorry for taking it out on me and admitted she was. She also mentioned it may be her insecurity and she just needs reassurance. So it did seem like a dual personality just from this situation I mentioned over a two day period.

she had demons in her, I briefly remember her also texting me one time saying she dissociated and ended up about 20 minutes from home with no recollection. She also mentioned she would go completely black at times like she lost vision. I told her I am worried but she should’ve gotten proper help for it herself. Are symptoms like this related to any specific cause? I do genuinely care for her and want whats best for her.

It definitely helps a lot it does seem like her head would say one thing and her heart the other. She was torn between what she wanted and what she thought she needed by the sound of it. The wounded part did win, I think it was just survival for her at the end of the day and it made her feel safe at the time and she couldn’t process rational thoughts. This is what gives me hope that she will eventually come to realize I was good and loving and only wanted to help but for now I will try not dwell on the future as right now she may be really wanting to find her own path and start a new journey. I worry for people she may hurt in the future.

Thanks Tee, you have been great