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- This topic has 3 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 11 months ago by Barbara.
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January 10, 2014 at 5:08 pm #48899EParticipant
Hi everyone, I kind of disappeared for a while which I feel was a horrible mistake…I can’t believe that once things go the way we wish we tend to ignore the support that was there when we were down and in the dumps….my apologies to everyone. Well for those who know my break up story, it’s been a long road since I last posted on this forum…a quick update…..my ex contacted me in august and at first I was strong then was led by my heart not doing the right thing. He said he missed me and that he couldn’t stop thinking bout me during the month we were apart and that he understood what I meant that it’s the little things that matter and that his love was so strong…blah blah blah….but it worked…we started up again and I got my ring back on. Two months later I got married…congrats u say!!! Nope, things went back to what they were..I had heard along the way that he was going out and doing thgs and when I asked him that day he was declaring his love etc when he wanted to get back he said he was faithful and didn’t do anything but spend it with his boys…months later during an argument truth be told…yeah , he had gone out on a friendly date with his boys…and he said it was none of my business what he did cuz we weren’t together…..wow u say yeah. Had I known this I probably wouldn’t have gone back…why keep it from me esp when I asked to be told everythg so I could make a smart decision about getting back together. There’s more but too long to type…all in all I ran him out of house mon and changed the locks….gonna file for the big D next week….I’ve been so miserable throughout trying to keep it together and now that he is gone I feel relieved…any advice?????
January 10, 2014 at 5:51 pm #48901MarkParticipantHi E,
It sounds like you are in emotional upheaval at the moment so the best thing I can offer is for you to take care of yourself.Time to regroup emotionally and in order to do that is to have no contact with him. You would need to be with yourself and the decision you made. In order to get to tha place of peace, you would need to sit with that, be with that, and get use to that decision without him.
I wish you Peace. Give yourself time and best to take care of yourself without any contact with him in order to do so.
Metta,
MarkJanuary 11, 2014 at 11:20 am #48920MattParticipantE,
Welcome back! I’m sorry for your suffering, and agree with Mark’s kind reminder to be self nurturing. My guess is you not only stepped away from tinybuddha (which is fine and usual) but also stopped or slowed your self caring practices (usual, but less fine). Perhaps consider getting your tush back on a cushion, back in the tub, and breathe. Cry, yell, breathe. Laugh, sing, breathe. Remember that you are the shepherd of your own light.
Hugs to you, dear sister, may your grief pass with grace.
With warmth,
MattJanuary 11, 2014 at 3:01 pm #48938BarbaraParticipantHi E and Matt
i made the same mistake with stepping away from tiny buddha and my self care. I have to try to do the same as u E. Back on the cushion Matt- so true.
I am litterally in inertia about letting go of my relationship, and i feel deeply ashamed that i cant just “do what i have to do” but sometimes i just procrastinate because i love him and i am avoiding having to grieve. As much as i love him – we are not meeting eachothers needs and we want to change eachother. It is hard to let go. And the guilt i feel for wasting my time is so strong. I know im going against myself, but my love and attatchment to him keeps me here on this merrygoround.I have missed Tiny Buddha, and want to wish you a happy new year. I hope it will be a good year.
Lots of warm wishes 🙂 and i hope you are well.
Barbs. -
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