mcsync’s advice is very good. I love that. Yeah, give her those tomatoes. Over and over, as many times as it takes. Lovely.

Waiting or wishing for ‘closure’ can be a real mental trap. You have closure. Whatever happened, happened, and then some other stuff happened, and time passed, and now you’re here still holding that door open to the past. But it’s past. The past is closed, by defition.

Next time you’re lying in bed listening to yourself tell the same old tired story about the purse or the argument or whatever, see if you can pay attention to the emotion behind the story. And not just name (I’m so upset!) and going back to the story, but really feeling what effect it has on your body, where in your body it lives, what texture it has, what colour or sound it makes you think of. And when your mind starts yapping away again (it will), just gently lead it back to the feeling: “OK, I know, I know about that. But let’s feel it. Let’s really feel it, without words.”

Also meditate (this is a meditation technique, so using it in meditation will be useful).