Hey,

Really interesting post and something i’ve been thinking about recently. I think what you have described is a prime example of how there is nothing inherently ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and how everything contains within it the potential to cause conflicting emotions to arise. So on the one hand you’ve seem to more-or-less have reached a state where you have become disconnected from your ego. This is, on one level, incredibly good; the ego, when left to ‘run’ wild can be extremely destructive at worst and very shallow at best (judging your own or someone else’s character based on material possessions, status etc.). However, the ‘bad’ emerges when you say that this has made you feel disconnected from the ‘only world [you’ve] known’. My only advice would be to persevere with this attitude. Just because it seems as if everyone else is living the ‘ego-driven life’ does not justify it or make it a good thing. Try not to judge those who do and, if you can, discuss the dominance of ego with others and see if you can get them to see how messed up it can be. Having said this, there are plenty of people out there who aren’t particularly egotistical or shallow, or whatever who still live in Western society. I think you can tune out some of society’s bullshit and just try not to pay attention to it.

Apart from anything, there is nothing inherently wrong with deriving some pleasure from material things such as clothes or cars, so long as you don’t attach to this pleasure and think that your possessions are indicative of who ‘you are’ or make you a superior person to others etc.

Hope you have a great day 🙂