So I think the topic title can already pretty much tell you the issue I am dealing with in my relationship. Background basically I went to a caribbean medical school for 2 years on an island. I had a very close group of friends from the start just the 5 of us we were pretty much family but had a tighter bond than with all our other friends. One of them Im going to change his name to Bob was one of my best friends or at least we considered each other as best friends. After about 8 months of school I ended up dating this guy who was also in our class. We knew each other from the beginning of school and liked each other but never dated until 8 months later. On the island everything was great all our friends and classmates were together all the time thats all we had was each other. Recently in the last 4 months my boyfriend and I moved to New York , now being together for 1 year and 8 months. We decided to live together and get through this journey of being doctors together. He started his rotations first working at the hospital and I am about to start in a week. I made the decision to come earlier to New York and study for my board exams here etc just so we could be together. Now this is the issue our friend Bob who became his best friend after we started dating just moved here 2 months ago. The only friends we have here are Bob and another friend from the island (a guy) and that guys guy friends who all live in NY. So far when we go out its me and the boys and its been like that for over a month now. Ive always the type of girl to get along with guys well so its never an issue for me because I always make sure I put time into my girlfriends but I can always hang with the guys no problem. Here is what Im dealing with , our single best friend bob has been single for a while he never really dated or ever had a relationship (he is 29 in a few months, btw I am 28 and my boyfriend is 25) . Bob has a tendency to make these comments when he hangs out with me and my boyfriend the 3 of us alone. He says things that hurt my feelings always implying how my boyfriend should be single and just saying things that are very rude and not needed to be said. When my boyfriend doesn’t want to go clubbing every weekend with Bob and his single guy friends , Bob thinks its because Im telling him not to which is so hilarious because most of the time my boyfriend doesn’t even tell me the stuff Bob invites him to. He just genuinely does not want to club 3 times a weekend and get trashed. He’s is very into his career and a little more mature than his age which is why I dated him. Our friend bob is a little crazy, he gets trashed every weekend and does drugs even in that he is in rotations at the hospital right now and can get drug tested at any time. He’s the guy that gets kicked out of the club every time! You can get an idea of how he is. So for me this is not someone I want to be around too much. I am about to be a doctor and I want to act like it. My boyfriend sees nothing wrong with the way Bob acts or anything Bob even says to me that hurts my feeling. He says its all in my head and that I should not be mean to Bob about how he’s living his life. I have no issue thats fine Bob can do whatever he wants but when someone who is supposed to be my best friend basically is trying to hurt my feelings of course I am not down with that. You give respect you get respect back. When the 3 of us hang out they walk off together sometimes end up losing me in the busy new york crowd but I keep my mouth shut. Neither of them sees anything wrong with that. IF they want boys time thats fine and my boyfriend knows I am all for that but he just never wants to be without me hanging out so I become 3rd wheel. My boyfriend is so blind to all of this and it hurts me even more when he stands up for his friend and calls me mean for saying something about him but when Bob hurts my feelings with his comments my boyfriend can not empathize with me at all ever. I am the bad guy always and I hate it. Please someone give me advice!!! I don’t know what to do anymore. I thought by this age we would all be more mature and especially becoming doctors a little more compassionate.