Why I Learned to Stay Quiet to Be “Good”
“Your silence will not protect you.” ~Audre Lorde
When I was little, I learned that being “good” meant being quiet.
Not just with my voice, but with my needs. My emotions. Even the space I took up.
I don’t remember anyone sitting me down and saying, “Don’t speak unless spoken to.” But I felt it—in the flinches when I was too loud, the tension when I cried, the subtle praise when I stayed calm, agreeable, small. I felt it in the way adults sighed with relief when I didn’t make a fuss. I felt it in the way I stopped …