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Amanda M

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Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)
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  • in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #272031
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Anita, that is an interesting insight. Possibly… Cassie and I have been friends since I was 7, we are now 27… it seems more deep rooted…

    in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #272021
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Oh and the complaint to Cassie. I went out with Cassie for her birthday. Matt was visiting so he went out with my husband and Matt brought his new girlfriend. His girlfriend was very rude and mean. I told Cassie about it at the party because she said omg you didn’t have to come I know you have visitors and I said oh I’m glad to get away Matt’s new girlfriend is not nice. I have talked to Matt about that and he has even apologized to us for his and her behavior that weekend.

    in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #272019
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    Thank you, of course.

    Matt is my husbands best friend. He has five best guy friends. Matt and I always got along very well. Never any romantic feelings or anything close to that. He was the only single one in the group and so I would try and set him up with people. Because he was the only single one he also would travel to visit us because he moved back home and we live in a large city so he would spend a few weekends with us. He went thru a few girls that were not the best and he would talk to my husband and I about them so that’s how I was able to understand his type which is why I thought Cassie was perfect.  He would bring these girls to weekend visits. It was an innocent game. That’s why it’s so odd that when he clicked with my best friend it got so sour. Now Matt and my friend Cassie no longer speak to us or seek out time to spend together. They are rude to us when we do see them and have become friends with people that we all didn’t previously like.

    in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #271947
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Hi Mark,

    Thank you for responding. Looks like I had some typos or confusion, oops!

    1) I was upset with Cassie for going behind my back and inviting her boyfriend Matt to my house when I said it was all girls staying there. It was a girls night. I asked her multiple times if she wanted to cancel and that she could, but that Matt couldn’t stay there with all these girls who were standing up in my wedding who didn’t know him. I lived in a 800 square foot apartment in the middle of the city. She invited him anyways and he invited other friends.

    2) I was frustrated that Cassie after that situation above sat across from me at our rehearsal dinner saying how awkward it was to give a speech and how she wasn’t giving a speech.

    3) Matt was one of my best friends and her and Matt have said stuff about my husband and I. Matt is also my husbands best friend. They both do not talk to us now.

    4) Cassie is my childhood best friend and Matt is my husbands. We do many group activities together with Matt and my husbands friend group. They do not reach out to us since they started dating which is strange, two best friends dating one another. And it has shifted my husbands friends group because when Cassie and Matt are there they are not fun and can be very rude. They also hang out with this girl who we don’t get along with and together they are not fun. That is how they have shifted the group. We find ourselves not wanting to go to events because if they are there it’s not fun and awkward because everyone thinks we are all best friends but secretly we don’t talk at all anymore.

    5) I’m sure over 5 years I have gossiped about the friends to her, we were in separate groups and it is not right to gossip. But everything I told her was just my  truth about situations. I’m not sure if bringing that up would surface more stuff? She might not even remember anything. I just know this one night I complained about Matt years before they knew one another and I told Matt the same thing I told her.

    6) I am trying to move on but it’s hard because she is now always attached to my husbands friends group.

     

    Does that clear up the story? Sorry was typing so fast.

    in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #271943
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Sorry, I meant to add this too. I am not a tic for tax person but with her I find myself being one. Something reminds me of her and I refuse to reach out. If she reaches out which she has like never I won’t respond for days… this is not like me at all!

    in reply to: Childhood friend is becoming a source of extreme anger #271941
    Amanda M
    Participant

    P.S. My husband I have made multiple attempts to hang out with them and change ou mindset than the ones mentioned here. Once we did a trip together and it ended with Cassie and I talking about Hawaii giving each other shit and then Cassie going too far and getting personal and dishing out our friend group dirty laundry, making me look terrible and she was like smiling because everyone was like wow and she got attention from it. Girls trip was supposed to be a girls trip but no one told us one night we were going to go out out all night and the girl I flew with and I were exhausted from flying so it was a tension and it was fine we have been friends from years but she brought it up like ya and then you and Emily ruined our night out because you were tired. And also we have arranged get together they have NEVER.

    in reply to: Work Decision- Panic Mode #271873
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Hi Anita & Pink,

    Happy New Year! I wanted to write to you an update. The job that was part time my principal fought for it to be full time so I could accept. We really vibed! I left my old job and am so happy. I’m teaching part time a new subject after 5 years in one and then the other part time is helping my principal with projects around the school, something that is also extremely new! But I love it, I am appreciated and like the challenges! Thank you for pushing me to push myself for more opportunities !

    in reply to: Work Decision- Panic Mode #222717
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Hi Anita!

    I did marry Pat- just this June! Same man as the thread earlier.

    I did reject the position but I’m sure it is still open.

    Usually I can make a decision but I have spent two days worrying about this so I’m very nervous.

    They have already eliminated some of my classss and have taken away my classroom (something that is never done at my school).

    I’m so worried about the constrain of a part time and the uncertainty to teach something I don’t want to teach and find odd jobs after five years in the classroom.

    But remembering my administration and how had they would make every day and if they are already targeting me makes me feel like the year will never end and it isn’t started.

    in reply to: Its my fault? #38772
    Amanda M
    Participant

    Dear Matt & Ananya.

    Thank you both for your voices and beauitful insightful messages. Ananya I took your advice and sent Pat the link. Little did I know that before I sent that link, Pat was already having regrets, When I met with him this weekend he approached me with open arms and apologies. We spoke about differnt issues in our relationship and seem to be back in a place of love. I was shocked at the realizations he spoke about, and relieved to hear him say that this has made us stronger and he knows how much he loves me through this experience. We have both put it behind us and are moving forward.

    With love,
    Amanda

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)