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Amy

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  • in reply to: Good enough #45514
    Amy
    Participant

    I use positive self talk. When i notice thoughts of “i’m not good enough”‘, I turn it around and say things like “I am good enough, i am me and that is enough”. My self esteem has improved too thanks to talking to myself nicer. I also do this thing where whenever i catch my reflection in a mirror i find one thing i like about myself. I try and find different things every time, things i may have not noticed before. I congratulate myself on my successes be them big or small. I try new things, even though that is very hard for me. I do anything that will make me feel good about myself. I try to let go of comparing myself to others whenever i notice myself doing it.
    It’s a gradual process, one i’ve been doing for awhile now. But it does get easier.

    in reply to: Blind Anger? #43808
    Amy
    Participant

    Anger doesn’t come from nowhere. You need to ask yourself some questions about the resons you are angry. Then you can start dealing with the issues that got you there in the first place. Being able to talk through your anger with a therapist will be hugely valuable to you. You have to know that the things that you went through as a child were not your fault or in your control. Your anger is probably justified, but with therapy you can learn how to let it go. After all holding on to anger will only hurt you, not the person you are angry at,

    I grew up in a very invalidating/neglectful environment. So much so that i developed borderline personality disorder. I was so angry i turned to self harm. I manipulated and hurt people without knowing what i was doing. I couldn’t let go of anything, especially my anger. It hurt too much, i felt like if i let it go, i would have nothing. And what was nothing like? I was so afraid to change because i was in such pain. I felt like my life experiences were so different to that of everyone else around me that i had become something different. I could see people and life in a way no one else could. It made me feel like i had some kind of special ability. In reality i was just a very hurt and angry person who was just hurt and angry. I wasn’t special in any way. I had just been through things most people don’t.
    I have learned through therapy that i don’t have to let anger control who i am, i can live a positive, peaceful life if i want to. And i do.

    I wouldn’t necessarily suggest medication to you. I have been on a tonne myself, and have found therapy is the best answer and then now i am following that up by living by the buddhist teachings. Medication only masks the problem, it doesn’t get to the root of it. Like i said at the start, you are angry for a reason and once you start to work through it, it lessens and then eventually goes away. I really hope you will seek out a therapist, my best advice would be for you to see a psychotherapist, someone who specialises in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy).

    There isn’t anything fundamentally wrong with you, it is your thought patterns that are distorted is all. And it really isn’t impossible to change those. I hope you will choose to seek help and make your life the best it can be.

    in reply to: Peace #43807
    Amy
    Participant

    Thank you for the advise, i shall try to follow up with your recommendations.

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