Hi anita,

It’s good to hear from you.

I think that you’re right about being direct with D. Now that I think about it, I may not have shown to her that I am interested in a romantic relationship. I’m going to give her some hints about it and get a date with her. Still, I don’t want to be too straight about my feelings. We’ve known each other for three months now and it’s understandable that she can’t feel the same. Sometimes it takes time to grow some feelings for someone else. I don’t know how to say it but I don’t want to break the actual lightness in our relationship with some serious and heavy words such as ‘I really like you, I wish I could spend more time with you’.

About the guy I met last night. I’ll try to see him in a couple of days.

About being brave. I think I can be brave when I’m alone with someone. But it’s true that it’s very much harder at a party for instance. I never really liked going to parties. I used to feel aloof and unable to connect with people. But even now, I know that it is not the kind of place for me and I can’t help but feeling bored very quick.

What do you think about A? Should I send her a text?

Dear anita,

I’ll do my best to follow your advice ! I know that I’m going to need to socialize more than ever for the next couple of years. I’m starting to think that it’s going to be alright 🙂 Thank you for your answer, anita

Daniel

Hi Alexandria,

Actually, I’m starting my 4th year of medecine school (I live in France) next month. In the next three years, I will work at the hospital every morning and have to go to the library everyday until noon in order to get ready for exams (one every 3 months). Many students told me that those three years are tough and most of them seem to have a really bad time. Maybe it won’t be so hard for me (hopefully 🙂 ). I’d love to make at least one good friend though. Loneliness and feeling misunderstood really brings me down sometimes.

Thank you for your message ! It feels good to know there are others introverted people out there. They are so hard to find though.

I think I saw a video that seems like the one you describe. It makes me think of mindfulness.

Hopefully you’re right about things getting better

Hi Peter,

I’m gonna check it out, thanks !

Dear anita,

I think you’re right about the way I see what it is to be loved. But I also miss some intimacy and physical touch. Sometimes, I can fully aknowledge the fact that I am loved but still I can’t help but feeling not loved. I know that I give so much power to my feelings that I often listen to them more than my logic when it comes to seeing the world.

I understand your point about leaving home. But in order to live on my own, I would have to get a part time job besides going to the uni. I don’t think that’s worth the hassle.

Hi Peggy

Thank you for your reply

How can I change my thoughts? I’ve asked myself this question for a couple of years and never found a satisfying answer.

Actually I have a few people in my life with whom I can share my inner feelings but still it’s hard for them to understand me. And I can’t help but feeling alone with my feelings.

I guess you’re right about joining groups, I should definitely check it out.

My family don’t understand me and is often busy with work and taking care of my little brother. Most of the time, I’m the only one who can take care of myself.

I think I know who I am but still I know I don’t love myself. How could I when I don’t feel loved by anyone?

3 things I like about myself:

– I am kind. I care about how others feel and I want to reassure them if they are doubtful or listen to them when they need to.

– I can be brave. Sometimes, I find the courage to do what everyone else is afraid of.

– I try to see beyond the physical aspects/body of people. I love getting to know people, asking questions about themselves, their hopes, fears… Sad that I don’t find places where I can do that.

3 things I enjoy doing:

– Music. Playing, listening, singing, talking about it…whatever

– Having deep talks with another one. It can be anyone, really.

– Reading. It’s amazing how the mind can wander when I read a book I like. It makes my heart and mind lighter.

Thank you again Peggy