@danielledeleo,

The mind doesn’t dwell on the bad until the bad appears. That’s what our feelings are for. They alert us when things go wrong. You sound like a really smart person, and it doesn’t sound like you’re being led astray by your feelings. Honestly, if he can’t accept your love now, what is the possibility that he will change? It sounds like you’ve done everything in your power already. To go on pretending like you’re okay inside, instead of accepting reality for what it really is will be bad for the both of you in the long run. You’ll only be prolonging the pain.

So my advice is: Stop looking for gratitude where there is none to be found. And realize you already have the wisdom and answers you seek. If you look back at your posts, who’s back are you protecting and defending? It isn’t yours.. The thing that you have to do more of? Protecting and defending yourself. It’s self compassion.

“This too shall pass”, only if you allow it to. The storm won’t pass if you keep following it.

Also, the feeling that “everything will turn out okay”, is a way to comfort yourself into a dangerous situation.. it’s a naive excuse that I’ve used many times in my life as well. It’s an excuse that basically tells yourself: it’s okay not to do anything. The only time it is okay to say, everything will turn out okay, is after you’ve done all you could, in your power, to change a situation. Look at your options again. Don’t keep making the same mistakes. Do what you’re most afraid to do.

• This reply was modified 10 years, 3 months ago by Brytt.