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ChristinParticipantI think I finally came to the realization that the reason why I wanted to reconnect with him in the first place, was mainly because I felt lonely after the recent date I had. I haven’t missed the guy I used to date in the last 4 months at all, so me wanting to reconnect stemmed from loneliness, and maybe failure that the date I had wasn’t a success. So thank you again, for helping me think more clearly Anita.
ChristinParticipantThe date I was on last week, is actually the first date that I had since this winter. While I was comparing this recent first date to the first date I had with the guy I dated this winter, it made me miss the good time we had together. However, I realized I might just miss the idea of what could have been between us and the fact that we just weren’t compatible. I am also moving 2 hours away and it might not be the best idea right now. He had some good qualities, but also other qualities I do not want in a future partner. I just want to thank you for replying Anita, because I do think my childhood wounds had an impact with the future between me and this guy. However I don’t want to dishonor myself by dating a guy that I know is not right for me and I also want to honor myself and the decision I made this winter when I ended it with this guy. I have reflected a lot today and have figured out that it is for the best that I just let this situation stay in the past. I am sure there are other men out there that is a better match for me and will make me feel safe. I appreciate that you took the time to reply to my post, it means a lot.
ChristinParticipantHi Anita,
I grew up with a close family member that had an alcohol addiction and at an early age I was always very responsible and had to take care of my big sister a lot. It made me realize at an older age that I want a partner that knows right from wrong and that I don’t have to worry about doing irresponsible things, if that makes sense? I think drinking and driving is irresponsible behavior and it doesn’t matter if it’s a small glass of beer or a light beer. I find it irresponsible to be in the skiing slopes after drinking alcohol, when there’s small children around and when it is also illegal to bring beer into the area. It just made me afraid for others safety too. I had a date last week that I just didn’t think was the best, we had little to talk about and I just felt like we weren’t a good match at all… whereas with the guy I am writing about, the conversations were good and there wasn’t any awkward silences I guess.
ChristinParticipantOkay, thank you so much for both of the replies. It means a lot to hear others point of views. If I decide to message him it’s not to necessarily ask to be friends, but I just want to hear how he’s doing with his job and life in general. I don’t expect him to send a super long message if he decides to reply. However, I feel like I need to think more about sending a message. Maybe the past is the past, and I should just leave it at that.
ChristinParticipantSnapchat is a social media app like Facebook. It’s different in the way that you connect with friends/family through sending pictures through this app. I have never communicated with this guy on Snapchat ever, so that’s why I found it odd and maybe like it was a sign from the universe that I got this notification.
ChristinParticipantThanks for replying, it means a lot. I feel very excited about my move and meeting new people. However, I had a ‘not so good’ first date a couple of days ago and this morning I got a notification that the guy I’m writing about just made a new Snapchat user. It made me think about our happy moments together and I was thinking it was a sign from the universe that I should message him.I feel like when I am lonely, I sometimes forget all the «bad» things and only focus on happy moments though, so I am not sure if that’s the reason why I want to reconnect.
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