Yes, downsizing is definitely something I’ll need to think about.

My dad is stubborn, for sure. He doesn’t want to be a burden, and I don’t think he fully gets the stress his care puts on me. My mom lived in a nursing home about 3 years before she passed from Alzheimer’s and even then he said he didn’t want to be put away in a home like that – even though he knew that was the only decision to make sure mom was taken care of. He’s at the just right spot where he needs help but is aware enough to know if I tried to get outside help.  I keep telling myself that one day I will wish he were still here for me to fuss about. Some days that works!

Thanks Anita~

Hi Mark,

I didn’t get specific because when I started listing out everything, I felt like I was whining. I saved for years to have a deck built in the backyard and in March I hired someone to clean and re-stain it. He did such a bad job that he had to unscrew everything and flip the boards to start over. It still looks bad. It was my happy place after work and now I don’t want to even look at it.  The backyard is so full of weeds I don’t know what to do. I used a spray that was recommended to me and I failed to read the label – it was a weed and grass killer so everything died. Now nothing but weeds are growing and all the dead grass and weeds formed this think layer that is so bad that when we had a few days of rain the water didn’t drain and started flooding. Yesterday I found what I think are termites on the some the boards on the deck. It’s treated wood so didn’t think that could happen, but ok. Work has been taking a big downturn. I’ve been blessed in the past to not really stress over being able to pay bills, but now I’m worried about the next couple of months if things don’t pick up. I took a demotion because of the time I need to care for my dad. He is very stubborn and refuses to even think about either getting someone in during the day to help him with grocery shopping/cooking/cleaning, much less moving into a retirement community.  It just feels like every aspect of my life is falling apart and needs my full and complete attention to fix.