Hi. I know how you feel. I’m quite a bit older, but not too much wiser. It took me a Master’s degree in education and several years of realizing that I am NOT a teacher, although the kids and parents and administrators loved me. I too have a creative streak. At 25 I was working in the theatre, best job I ever had. I also love to write, sadly, until this June, I had not published anything at all since I was 25. I let life and others guide me and my path.
Chin up. Your current job supports you and you can carve out a small niche for yourself to release your creative tendencies. Maybe go back to school for the arts at night. It won’t be easy. Trust me. I am 48. I just launched my positive psychology blog in April, and I am in school learning to be a life coach. Hopefully I will be certified by the end of November. I am submitting a bunch of my original prose, poems and short fiction all over the place, trying to get my name out there. I’m not only reading again, but reviewing other author’s books on my blog and elsewhere. Before I expire and retire from this earth, I plan to publish an anthology of my poems.
You must learn to face your fears, and go with your gut instinct. Being stuck is never a good place to be, nor is the feeling that we are doing a job in order to survive. There is a difference between surviving and living. You have some hard choices ahead. Believe in yourself, be mindful, and the truth will come.