fbpx
Menu

Intrepid

Forum Replies Created

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • in reply to: Boyfriend's female friend situation #60654
    Intrepid
    Participant

    Jane,
    I’ve been in a relationship for many years, and I have a couple of long time male friends that are very close to me. If they needed a place to stay or were in crisis I would help them and truthfully I don’t know if it would even occur to me check in with my partners feelings about the situation. After all a dear friend is in need, I would expect him to understand and be fully supportive. If he doesn’t trust me or has insecurities in our relationship then likely there is bigger problems then a friend staying with me. Another perspective could be a respect for the length he’ll go to care for his friends. I can relate to bottling up emotions until I blow up, (I think all women can!) but likely his distancing and not understanding your feelings is a result of your original point being lost in translation. He may also feel hurt, or attacked, or insulted. The 2 year mark is often a “make or break” time in relationships, and this is a situation where a ton of faith and trust is required. It may be unfair to decide that he’ll react this way in the future. Maybe you guys can use this as an opportunity to hone those communication skills and grow as a couple. Good, solid relationships take work, patience, and trust. Just my thoughts. I wish you the best

    in reply to: FEEL LOST AND ALONE #60493
    Intrepid
    Participant

    Tracey,

    I came on the site today as I am experiencing something akin to your situation. I’ve been with my man for 11 years though. And the friends I’ve reached out to are the same ones I’ve spent months supporting through various issues while coping with my own issues. I don’t feel they owe me anything, I gave it freely. But still, I was so hurt to find that lack of support.

    Matt, the response you gave was so insightful! It’s a lesson I’m learning and struggling with a great deal. I’ve noticed even when I do find support I don’t feel any better and I’ve been suspecting it’s because the person I need support from is me. A friend that is very supportive, but also very busy, told me “It’s time to pull up your big girl pants and learn to walk alone.” Lol! It may sound blunt, but he said it with love and it really stuck with me.

    Tracey I pray we can both utilize the wise advice Matt has given, and learn to be our own support system.

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)