There isn’t another woman. There could be another one that he’s talking to casually, but no one serious. He can’t do that right now.

his life is really stressful and he is a really great guy. He thinks that he couldn’t give me what I need right now.
When I started dating him I had a pretty solid list of criteria that I was looking for and would work for me. I am 30 so I Starting to take my dating more seriously. One of my main criteria is that he knew where he wanted to be and he had a stable job. He did when I met him. Then a month into us dating he quit that job and started traveling for a month at a time for work. Though it wasn’t what I wanted I found him to be everything I looked for in a man and he was so incredible I tried my best to be supportive and see that this is temporary.

however, during this period, I became emotionally unavailable because fears started coming up because of this change. I would act distant in little ways and I think he really felt it.

then I did something that he felt was disrespectful. That day at the beach I mentioned earlier. I can understand how he felt it was disrespectful, however I can also see my point of view. There was really only 3 options I had: 1) continue to sit on the beach by myself and feel terrible 2) pull him out from surfing and ask him to sit with me, which would then make me feel stupid and possible make him resent me 3) accept he chose to surf instead of being with me and that is what he really wanted to do and let him do it…but also to not put myself in an uncomfortable situation and leave. So I chose 3.

I honestly do see the validity of us not being together. But it sucks because the way our break up went down shows that there is a bunch of feelings there. It went on for a month of “let me think about it’s” and him not wanting to lose our connection but him feeling that he had nothing to give. And I agree, he doesn’t. I Never wanted to lose him. He is beyond special to me…the day I met him I felt like I knew him my whole life. It was magic in every way. Our time together was a daydream and I hope he still feels the same way.

when officially stoped hashing things out, I told him that I really thought he was going to be the one and that I wanted to start a family with him. Because I honestly did. And I honestly do.

he’s off on a new work trip, and with covid, his client has him basically on lock down. He reaches out to me because of little things, but nothing huge. I respond but I don’t reach out. I don’t like his social media posts. He likes all mine. His aunt and his mom like my photos too.

im hoping when he comes back in January we can restart. He’s the right guy at the right time in my life just at the wrong moment in his.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 5 months ago by Jane.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 5 months ago by Jane.

he told me he loved me and that he didn’t want to lose our connection.

And the love making was better for him than it was for me…I know by his reaction.