Hello Sarah and Becky
Like you both, my life has not been the greatest up to now, that is how i feel right now, but when i am feeling okay about life I can see that my life has had some sparkling moments. Due to childhood that was not the greatest I have grown up relying on me and am quite a loner because I realised long ago that the only person who you can truly rely upon is yourself, however this does lead for a lonely existence and when things go wrong in your life there is no one to help or turn to, but reaching out is scary because we risk being hurt. Friends should be non-judgemental and should be there for us, just as we would be for them, if they cannot be then this says more about them than us and it just means a better friendship is out there for us.
If i can support in anyway I am here x