Anything honestly. Just a mash up of the past 2 days.

I tell him that my friend was going to come over to the house. Ya kno just being courteous and letting him be aware. My friend had to stay at work a little later than they thought though and got hungry so they wanted me to meet them at a restaurant. Which was what they wanted to do originally but I said no because I am saving my money. But they were hungry enough to be like I’ll buy. So I text him and tell him because he was working late and hadn’t communicated with me when he would be home. Its probably about 7:40pm. I have been off since 5 right. So I tell him “Hey I am going to meet Jimmy (Gay BFF) at Griffs. Then we are coming back to the house. I will see you when we get back since your still camping out at work”

GIRL. …Mad

All of a sudden he comes at me like “Damn Aite” and Im just confused. Whats to damn about right? You aren’t even here. So we go back and forth thru text for a minute while I am still trying to get out the house as well to meet my friend. And he on some “Oh well I guess Ill go find something else to do” Blah blah blah. I call him while I was driving and he basically tries to imply (because he knows everything) that I ALWAYS knew we were going to eat I just didn’t say anything. NEGATIVE. I was laying in the bed with a Tshirt on waiting for Jimmy to say he was down stair so I could put pants on. Literally I had no clue but there isn’t any arguing with him. He just says Im talking in circles and he doesn’t want to hear it. So I go to dinner we come back in literally a hour and he isn’t there. I call him he said he went to get something to eat. probably 1-1/2 later I call again he says hes at his moms about to be back. He comes in as Jimmy is leaving around 11pm. He comes in with just a stank attitude. Doesn’t want to give me a hug. When he gets mad he wont hug me or kiss me and stuff.

That night he wanted to argue just picking at anything ya know. Then yesterday just picking and poking at anything to go back and forth about.

Girl. I asked him lastnight if he wanted to meditate with me right. He said yea. I have a Meditation basics app on my phone that teaches you how to meditate so I grab my phone. Hes like “Oh nah! Im not doing that. You don’t need a app. you rely on the internet for everything” Blah blah blah. I’m just taken a back like Im confused. ” Meditation IS A SKILL. You have to learn it! Oh I thought you was going to tell us what to do blah blah. I was like no. I don’t know how that well yet. MEDITATION is a LEARNED SKILLLLL! literally he just didn’t get it. I just got mad it made my anxiety go off the scale because WHY is it that serious.

He slept on the couch smh. Then this morning he didn’t come in the room to tell me he left work work (6am cuz Im still sleep). Anytime were on good terms and usually even on bad sometimes he will come in and say “Im gone” *HUG* *KISS*

Not today tho!

I text him like “Why do I feel you do things purposely to hurt me” He says I don’t—next msg– just like you don’t.

Im like this is literally a big adult game of “I know you are but what am I?”

He does the silent treatment a lot. He’s gotten better about it because I flipped out about it.

He gets mad when he doesn’t feel “special.” or like I didn’t think about him.

Changes in plans REALLLLLY annoys him hence the beginning story. Because I went to dinner with another friend of mine a few days before that and no issue.

He gets mad if I don’t text him back in a certain amount of time (unknown time because it literally depends on his mood) Things I literally have no control over.

He gets really irritated when I miss his phone calls which bothers me because I feel this need to constantly check my phone ya know. Out of my natural want to do it.

His feelings are facts in a nutshell.

Hey Anita,

I cant quite iron out if your saying “even though your birthday isn’t a holiday” or “even though IT IS on a holiday”

My birthday is the end of September so no actual holidays occur around it.

But growing up my birthday was never really a special thing. It was “acknowledged” but I never had birthday parties growing up. I think I had one birthday celebration growing up as a child when I was maybe 4. I was too young to remember really; that says the most.

My family usually throws a dollar bill at any issue truthfully . They really don’t care about your feelings. We aren’t rich but we are pretty well to do across the board. So my relatives usually would just give me money, a lot of them wouldn’t call or anything. Even now they don’t. But it was only the ones who I saw often like my Aunt or grandfather.

I don’t have a very close relationship with anyone in my family. It used to be my mom but that has dwindled away over the past 2-3 years. I have a brother we are more tolerable of each other now than ever before in our childhoods. We really used to not care for each others company really. But even though now we mentally are on a different playing field we get along but still rarely ever talk or see each other. I really don’t have a person that I can turn to in my family and be transparent with.

I just kind of felt like my birthday didn’t matter. So when I came to college and my life changed I told myself well shoot if no one else will do it I’ll do it. To most of my friends and people who have gotten to know in college really acknowledge my birthday like its a holiday. My best friends literally take off work from their jobs lol. I always throw a huge party and I hangout with my friends and I go to dinners and maybe get a few gifts. My birthday from 2011-2016 are really some of the best memories I have.

This year I didn’t really celebrate my birthday.  That really bothered my mom, to add. Ironic to the fact that she never really helped in the celebrations of my birthdays growing up. She felt like it was because of Glen. You read the above stuff about what went on. He did kind of ruin it…or well better yet I LET HIM.

I just didn’t feel it for some reason. I was like “my birthday is cancelled this year.” I saw my mom to appease her and another friend of mine and that’s it.

My friends were really disappointed when that was my responses to their pre-birthday plan text.

Hi Inky, I really appreciate the feedback and the time it took for you to read the foolishness above. Your right they’re both kind of egotistical.

Your also probably very right about John I’m sure he hasn’t been twiddling his thumbs under a tree for a year.

Glen just I  don’t know. He made me pretty mad last night so I can’t speak on him without being biased in what I say. lol

They’re both a lot, and I guess you are right. BOTH not good for me.

What’s crazy is… giving you the scoop lol… there’s actually one more person involved in this story I left out. He popped back up right before me and John started our relationship and John basically was like don’t talk to him. Then popped back up again after we broke up and I had to stop talking to him again because of Glen. **NEW PERSON INTRO ALERT** we can call him Leo. Leo was basically the first guy I ever really like when I came to college. I didn’t date in highschool so he was the first guy I ever really said I liked and really started talking to.

Leo had issues though his mom died, he lost his scholarship to college as a result of his grades slipping. He went thru a lot and I was always there for him as much as I could but we started to kind of bicker about things and ended up stop being friends or whatever you want to call it. Having expectations of people you shouldn’t usually goes that way. He was emotionally unavailable. It was a huge situationship. But that was after 2 and a half years almost 3. I have know Leo for 6 years now. We didn’t talk for almost 2 years before he basically came to me and apologized for all the things he knew he was wrong in doing when we were friends and in so many words basically told me he loved me.

Leo was kind of always my prince charming back then. when we reconnected distracted with John and Glen I felt I had outgrew him.

He was bringing me gourmet cupcakes and stuff every time I would see him, he was just so nice and different. Pretty sure he was asking me on dates but I was kind of a flake and deflected. Like he had really overcame his demons you know. It was good to see. He sat me down and we talked about what all went on during the time we spent together. He took accountability for his wrongs and how he acted. He told me he really loved me then he just didn’t know how to express it. I was the only person who didn’t leave him. He said that he was even sorry for all that I went through in my relationships since then because if he wasn’t in the head space he was we probably would have been together. He said “I honestly feel like if we had got together we would have never broken up and you wouldn’t have had to go thru all of this” *POST BREAK UP WITH JOHN*

Out of the 6 guys I dated in the 6 years since I have know him (since we really never “dated” ) I can say all of them tangibly did something that was a reason to not talk to them accept Leo. Liar, Cheater, Inconsiderate, etccc…

But pretty sure after I stopped talking to him after Glen he wont be speaking to me ever again lol

But that is a good juicy side bar story.