Thank you for your comments and thoughts. I don’t follow the ‘happy clappy’ method of positive thinking, and am fully aware that bad things happen for us to grow. I just sometimes feel burdened that each time I try to make something good from all the bad stuff: more bad stuff appears that stops me being able to do some good? Does that make sense? I am not a fan of books like The Secret. I do feel there is truth in being relaxed helps to attract relaxing circumstances, but obviously you have a world where Buddhist monks have been violently murdered for their beliefs etc, so it does not seem to wash.

I am not looking for karma as revenge. I am just trying to find some inner peace, by understanding why each day almost is a lesson in suffering. Surely as it gets too much, a cosmic break would enable me to be of more service to others?

Thank you for all your suggestions. He is better today, I know he was concerned as he was stressed about something. He usually is okay but when he gets stressed, I get the verbal brunt of it (I could cope normally but have had an horrendous year, which is why I am less able to cope). I have read a book about the chanting, I will surely try this. Thank you.

They are not people to harm physically (no need for the police) but they have messed with my head by manipulating my life in such a way that I am almost destroyed. Yet this has not been done with intent, but by their sheer self-absorption. They believe they are victims, and have used my over-sensitivity and kind manner to their own ends, which is why I am reluctant to send a message, as I have not had contact with them for a long time.

I think Anita was right to say in a perfect world to send a sympathy, saying I want no further contact. I just feel this is going to be difficult to do without making them angry and more upset at a difficult time, so may have to leave it. Thank you for your answers.