anita –

i’m glad yesterday was a good discussion! for today, i emailed someone just to talk about records, but the whole thing turned out just to be a compliment and then a reply – which is totally fine!

i have a math test tomorrow that i’m a bit intimidated about, but i’m hoping that it goes well. it’s logic so it’s pretty different from just doing arithmetic.

i haven’t talked to the guy i like in a few days. it’s not exactly hard to get his attention. i guess that’s not the exact way to explain it. but it is hard to get him to talk to me. like just a regular conversation. i don’t know how to do it. i can’t tell if i’m too nervous or too bad at talking, but i always hope for anything i send him to hopefully start a conversation. it just hasn’t happened yet.

and i’ve been thinking more about acting/voice acting. i’m not really sure how to break out of my bubble of just daydreaming. it’d be nice to have a fun career like that. i think it’d be something i really want to do, but i think i get caught up in all the fun it may be and forget to take issues that could come along with it into consideration too.

this could stand for the thrid day of the assignment! i’m glad you challenged me to do something new and different everyday anita!

anita and joe –

i’m so glad i wasn’t the only one! i feel WAY better than i did before about the whole thing. i think what really did it for me was texas chain saw massacre. i saw it for the first time just two days ago and i felt so bad for liking the movie so much (esp. because it was based on a real thing). that one movie was out of my boundaries, i usually stick to the shining and anything else that’s more of a psyche trip. i like the idea of liking whatever we should like without a pause and maybe a lot of people mistake their anxiety for “whoa what’s happening to me right now/what am i bringing to myself and is this what i really want?” but in this case, maybe it could be fictional. maybe it is just us enjoying our natural way of feeling fear.

would you guys say that maybe that brings a balance for us? like how it’s not necessarily realistic for us to be happy all the time. sometimes we’ll feel sad or mad because of whatever may happen. so maybe this is the same? fear being the opposite of us feeling neutral or in total control?

anita –

this is what i’ve been thinking about this morning: is lacking activity in our interests meaning that we don’t like something?

like you know how people say things like “oh if you don’t do this or that for whatever person, then that means you never really loved them”. something like that. but what if you just don’t feel up to something or maybe like you can do something?

like reading. i love to read, but i haven’t really read anything in a while. i’ve been too out of my own senses to really concentrate on it and i already have all this other stuff from school to read. should i feel bad for not actively having fun or does that mean that i’m not necessarily interested in reading and learning on my own? i don’t know if this made sense, but hopefully it does even a little bit.

anita –

today i had to do group work in my english class and i’m shy so that’s something that pretty much breaks a little bit of ice, but other than that i don’t think i’ve done something (on my own will anyway). i did treat myself by buying a few things at the store. and then i had therapy today. it wasn’t the best session. we always spend most of the time talking about school, but i feel if i talk about something else i’d come off as pretty strange. it’s hard to talk about spirituality when someone’s trying to resolve situations in a almost medical way.

got it anita! talk to you tomorrow! goodnight 🙂

no problem anita and you take care of yourself too!

the answer might be obvious to this one, but do you think that material items can sometimes make us happy? especially when we don’t have friends? do you think that doing something for ourselves, doing something to make us happy will actually make us happy? and if not, what is it that someone can do to obtain some form of fun, confidence and happiness?