but what would you think about this: someone could give out all the love they wanted to. all the love they ever had, yet only get either nothing or a bad thing in return everytime. is the heart really a thing of worth or would you say that love around us is just void?

do you think it matters if we give love? what’s the point if we don’t recieve a good or true attitude in return? what are we benefitting?

and this is a question i had yesterday as well too, but i really had to think on it. because i really do believe that love is essential and love is always right, but in anyone and almost everyone else, i don’t see it. i feel like everyone is just out for themselves (which is probably true for the most part) or their motive is to hurt people. i don’t really see the point in giving or showing love when it’ll just go by ignored. and when i fet ignored or hurt, it makes me wonder if i really am worth something. i don’t see why people with good looks are somehow better and more worthy of fine things when there are people that actually show true beauty and they only get hurt.

i wish i could just send him something like that, but i think that if he were to either be oblivious to it or reject me, it would totally rip my heart apart. i can’t seem to get ready for that, especially since i feel mostly that he’s kinda not supposed to hurt my feelings if i were to send him that because i believe that he’s (probably) my soulmate. i don’t know if i’ve been god given confirmation, but i think that the way my heart feels during concentration on the situation is enough for me to believe it.

it’s easier said than done for sure, but i think one day, hopefully soon, i’ll be able to do something like that. i’m taking your story into so much consideration, but actually going and telling him, it’d be so awkward i think. just because i don’t feel like we have a close enough connection for me to talk to him about things like this. it’d almost be like a stranger confessing their love for you, even though we’re not complete strangers. we just haven’t gotten to know each other.

i just feel like a fool. like i should know better. i know i’m not the best, the coolest or the prettiest, yet i want him so badly. i feel like i should know that maybe he’d like someone better.

yes i see, and that’s exactly how old i am, i’m 19. it’s good that you make an effort every single day, as opposed to occasionally. i’m not so sure how i could do something like that. well, for what i’m after i think everyday would be too much with the way things are going – i say something and don’t necessarily get an answer. i have no idea of my standing right now. with him, with anything in my life. it’s like, i use power instead of waiting, but is there ever a time you can push the bar too far? i don’t know how boys work. not at all. and since he’s technically so far away, it’s even harder. there’s no understanding of what to do next. to leave him alone or just talk to him. it’s confusing.

• This reply was modified 8 years, 10 months ago by Wisdom.

i hope so too, for the both of us. and since you only started to shake some of that ice off, hopefully you can consider just trying to jump right into things, it might help things go even faster! i know it’s not easy, but it’s definitely worth a try or two 🙂

i’m glad you even went on this date with the fear you had. for the most part we could say that you fought off the fear you had when he asked to walk you home which would’ve only been 20 minutes, but you stuck around for 2 hours and that was brave of you! i can barely even get guys to notice me haha!

although he didn’t ask you for a second date and you were terrified to move and even breathe, i say you did perfectly well. no matter if he didn’t ask you for the second date. maybe it was a lesson of overcoming that fear. and maybe also to show that maybe he just didn’t deserve you. from all that you told me i suppose you two didn’t know much about each other, so who knows where it would’ve went if you did know something about each other? but god doesn’t make mistakes and i’m sure he’s led you to the right places afterwards.

that sounds amazing! you probably feel great after a 6 mile walk and eating afterwards (sounds like the life!)

and lmao at how you used idk for the first time! aw yeah!

i actually told him that i liked his hair last time i spoke to him and he said that he liked mine too, that’s as much affection i showed him last time we spoke. but after that we didn’t really say anything. our usual cliffhanger conversations lol

oh no no! he seems to not be interested in a relationship, I must’ve left out not haha! but anita, enjoy your wal in the rain and take in whatever you can and bask in it. just enjoy the energy that you receive and be safe!

I actually feel a little bad about even saying how I feel about him. idk, I just feel like i’m talking about him behind his back haha! even though i’m not saying anything bad and only simply asking for advice. I just feel like…i’m talking. idk lol.

but enjoy your walk and be safe!