I’ve read your story, and I feel for you. If you have a connection with someone, it’s hard to convince the heart of what the brain already knows. There’s a reason her boyfriend is so suspicious about her whereabouts. The fact that she was willing to make out with you (amongst other things) call it your little secret, then magically patch things up with the other guy? Unfortunately you may have just been her escape from reality. Or maybe you were there to help her remember her true self before the controlling significant other, or your affection made her feel better about herself in some way. But if she’s so conjoined with this guy and says it’s partially because of family, and they don’t have kids together then that’s not binding. I think you’re holding out for her while compromising your self worth. That’s why you’re able to accomplish so much when she’s not around – you associate your self worth with your success and that flourishes when you flourish. Also, I hate to say it, but based on your math this girl appears to be 21. No 21 attractive girl who’s equally ambitious is ready to settle down into a relationship unless she knows it’s the real deal. Yes, you may for awhile see her face in every other girl you attempt to date. But the real girl who’s down for you won’t make you work so hard, and you’ll love her even more for it. Best of luck to ya.