I’m as sad, as I am mad, as I am confused. I think I got over the giant hump of being so heartbroken two weeks ago when this whole thing started. He one day would go “i miss you, I miss us.” and then the next day say “I feel nothing towards you right now.” and then say “I want a hug.” He would say things like “my pretty girl” or “I won the jackpot” meanwhile he claimed he felt nothing towards me.  When we finally talked on the phone this past Monday he said “I don’t think I was every satisfied in our relationship in terms of reassurance, I didn’t like how you were pessimistic, and midway through the relationship I got tired of what we would always do the same thing.” I honestly don’t believe this really at all because all the time dozens of times a day I would say I love him, compliment him, etc. Also I have always been pessimistic since the day we started talking so if he didn’t like it at all then why did he wait to tell me sooner nor talk to me at all about it. All the time when we were together, I would ask him “what do you want to do?” He would answer with pretty much the same answer every-time so that’s what we did. Then when the phone call came to the end he said basically “I have no feelings for you but I don’t want you to date anyone else.” Basically all these things kept replaying in my head and it really wasn’t doing my mental health any good

Me and my boyfriend met in college. We have been dating for almost 8 months now, for the past 8 months we have been in just a wonderful place, never having one bad day with each other. We live in two different states for the summer so he decided he wanted to take a week and come visit me. During the week he was visiting I was supposed to show him around my hometown and where I grew up. He said he has never been the best fyler, and has always been anxious about flying. Unfortunately his first flight got delayed, so he couldn’t make his connecting flight, so then he fully cancelled that flight and got a new one. The new one, after sitting on the plane at the gate for 40 minutes, that flight got cancelled. He then proceeded  to wait in line for about 4 hrs to book a new flight. That day he was at the airport for about almost 12 hrs. He then got a new flight for Sunday morning and nothing went wrong with that flight. I picked him up when he got to the airport and he was ecstatic to see me. Monday, the next day, he woke up feeling achy and tired. We got breakfast and toured my town in the morning. When we got home that afternoon, we wanted to make sure it wasn’t covid because I had grandparents here, that probably wouldn’t do well if they got covid, he ended up testing himself and the test came up positive. I tested myself and was negative. He ended up quarantining in my room. I would visit him and sit with him with a mask on, I would bring him food and drinks when needed. He was upset that we couldn’t do anything we planned. Tuesday, I said to him, let’s go to the beach, let’s go take a walk and get some fresh air. So we went to the beach, walked around, skipped rocks, held hands, without masks. He seemed happy. We get back into the car and he says “can you take me back, I’m having these thoughts about us and am getting anxious.” So I took him back to my house, he proceeded to go right upstairs to my room, and shortly after when I went to go check on him, he was having a panic attack. He was shaking, couldn’t catch his breath, and ended up trying to throw up. He kept wanting to be left alone and he wouldn’t eat, he kept saying I just want to go home. Unfortunately because he had covid, and flights kept getting cancelled we had a really hard time trying to get him home. I woke up Wednesday morning feeling sick, I tested positive for covid that day. My boyfriend that day kept feeling really anxious and panicky and couldn’t seem to calm down so he just wanted to be alone. At one point during the day, he came to me and said “I know this is freaking you out, I have these thoughts, that I don’t like about us breaking up, but we are okay.” That night I talked to him and asked “Do you want to break up?” He bursts out into tears and says “I think I am falling out of love with you but I don’t want to be.” “I love us and I never wanted to break your heart.” I asked him when he started thinking that he is falling out of love with me. He responded “After I tested positive for covid.”  He then proceeds to say “I feel empty, nothing feels good right now, and my brain doesn’t feel like my own.” “I want to feel normal again.” We finally were able to get a flight home for him Thursday morning. We were five minutes away from the airport when we got a text saying “your flight is cancelled.” He starts to sob and say “I want to break up,” but then quickly goes “no, idk I don’t know what I want.” He ended up getting on the flight and leaving that afternoon. When he left we both sobbed in each other’s arms. He kept saying “I want to go back to normal, this is unfair, and it sucks, I wish things were different.”  Since then we have been talking but it is just different. I am confused on what to think, and how someone’s feelings could change in a matter of an hour, or even a few hours. Everyone that knows us as a couple said “he will never break your heart, he is so in love with you.” Is he just going through a depression episode and those feelings will come back? He can’t say he likes me or even loves me, but he does say he misses me, and us, and that he cares about me, and that I mean a lot to him still. He says he still only wants me but not right now.  I don’t know what to do or what to think. Should I have hope that his feelings will come back? He starts therapy soon.