Forum Replies Created
-
AuthorPosts
-
LavenParticipantAlso I read in her chart online that she hasn’t been in compliance with certain things the doctors instructed her to do, also she doesn’t ring the nurse for help with anything…she’s trying to do everything herself. They’ve informed the doctor and they’ve moved her room closer to the nurses station.
Idk if she’ll make it. They tell me that she’s doing better, but she is still hospitalized going on two weeks now…with daily extensions..
Also, she learned that one of her nephews (the sister that recently passed son) whom she was extremely close to passed away.
Her family reports that my fm had her bouts of confusion and it didn’t register, nor can she connect who he was.
If she survives this, I don’t think she’ll have much longer to live. She’s 92 and in poor health. She’s lost a significant amount of weight within the last 3 months, she doesn’t really eat, she’s frail and weak, and her equilibrium is off…it won’t be much longer..she even told me this herself before being hospitalized.
If she makes it home .I have a feeling she’ll develop some type of infection, have to be rushed back…and won’t make it..
She has no zest for life any longer.
LavenParticipantI’d rather her not suffer or be coerced to live when she really doesn’t want to…even if it means suffering the rest of life without her.
This is why I have very conflicted feelings every time I have to call for emergency services…I want to respect her wishes, but I don’t want to get in trouble nor be ostracized, exhiled, and insulted if I refuse to seek help..
Sometimes she doesn’t want to go to the hospital…
It’s not my call .it’s her family’s…which probably wouldn’t respect her wishes ..she doesn’t even want to tell them she’d rather not live anymore..she’s afraid and saddened to disappoint them
LavenParticipantAlso during this time one of my bio brothers (I have 2) who I haven’t heard from in years write me a lengthy letter, and promised to be there for one another, etc… I wrote him back and haven’t heard from him. .he’s not too busy to post on social media everyday though. he ghosted me…just like the other did.. they want nothing to do with me …nobody ever wants and chooses me.
LavenParticipantYears ago..around 8 now ..my ex boyfriend and I were together for 5 years. He played the role perfectly.. attentive, inspiring, caring, showed interest, was always there for me, etc..promised me marriage, that all my problems and me being a caregiver didn’t matter, etc .. well he promised me that he would see me the next day to try and work out things between us, I called later to ask what time, he basically had blocked me and he ghosted me…never saw me again.
When the phone finally answered, a woman answered and said that he’s with her then and, that he didn’t want me, and called me all kinds of names…and I heard my ex boyfriend in the background laughing while she insulted me. . He married her like 2 weeks after that…
So around that time, I was very depressed and begin correspondening with the “new” guy (we went to junior and high school together) online. We chatted for about a year and saw each other twice .just to talk .. Him and I chatted mainly for a few more years ..seeing each other off and on as friends. He played the role too. .just like the others.. always there, always responding, always communicating, etc … I would ask him if he was involved with anyone and he would always tell me no.
Whenever I needed just a hug, he always came out and gave me that. Which is why I thought nothing of it this time..I didn’t think he would do this to me ..after promising me a hug.. especially knowing what I’m going through currently….and on top of everything..it was my birthday then.
He told me he had just gotten back in town from being on a work related trip, and that he would give me one the next day.
He also told me that he wanted to talk about the possibility of us being together.
The next day comes, and that’s when he said he allegedly met someone this week and decided he was going to build a family with her. (I don’t believe this just happened spontaneously and impulsively) He alleges it wasn’t malicious (of course it was) he alleges that she asked him just that day and he just agreed to her request. (Don’t believe it)
When I start asking him questions like why he even agreed to see me and hug me when he knowingly and admittedly was or became involved with someone allegedly all week…and why he lied about wanting to build a future with me …
He told me that he didn’t care what I had to say anymore, and that it was over between us.. and that was that 😭
During the time I was involved with neighbor guy, him and I had minimized contact…to just a check up greeting how are things going text like once every three months…. After neighbor guy ghosted and played me the first time ,…I stayed away from both ..
.
Due to the current happenings in my life and my depression and loneliness.. I made the impulsive decision to contact them both …seeking some comfort or something…since I have no one….I just wanted a hug ….and to feel wanted and needed …even for a little.,even for pretend…
I never got that hug…and neighbor guy pretended and ghosted me again first…then the second guy .
I know it was a very bad decision to reach out ,.I’m just hurting, and vulnerable, and lonely.. my fm is still in the hospital and they keep adding days to her stay…and I’m lonelier than usual. The loneliness is somewhat bearable when she’s around ..now that she’s not, I exist in complete silence without human interaction or contact .unless her family calls and ask me things pertaining to her health…which is seldom …
I can’t even call my fm because allegedly something is wrong with her hospital phone ..even though her family gets through to her. She did tell me last time I spoke to her, to stop calling her and to rely on her family for updates…
I’m very saddened and disappointed in myself. I had gone 6 months without neighbor guy ànd even though it still hurts .I was in a better place of acceptance…and now all that is gone.
My fms in the hospital, during that time it was a very sad anniversary of my furry tragically passing 3 years ago (she was my everything), then my birthday that nobody ever remembers which is fine because Its not important to me, then the recent heartbreak and ghosting …it’s all too much and very overwhelming
March 20, 2024 at 3:32 pm in reply to: Is he playing?? Have I been ghosted?? Feeling stupid and heartbroken #428829LavenParticipantWe’ve only had sexual intercourse twice inn the relationship.
We use to talk daily multiple times. Both initiated. When we would have disagreements sometimes, and would stop communicating for a few days..due to differences of opinions..but he always ventured back to me often apologizing, telling me that he missed me, and just wanted to sit down and talk in person..that we never have to do anything that I don’t want to do. He’s never pressured me into having sex.
Two days before we saw each other last, he told me that he didn’t think it would work out between us and was pursuing other women on social media..and was going to focus on that… I got really upset and heartbroken and wanted clarity..then later on that day he begged me to forgive him and told me he was just saying that to make me jealous, and to see if I was really interested and cared about him. That he felt uncared for by me. He said now that he knew how I felt, he wanted to make plans to spend the rest of our lives together. That I was the only one for him, etc….
On the last visit, we decided to have sex…and afterwards we talked a bit before him leaving. Before he left he swore he would call and see me the next day, told me he loved me..and kissed me. I told him that we had to learn how to better communicate with one another, and not put much space between us when there are disagreements.
He agreed, and apologized profusely saying that he wouldn’t disappear anymore. That he often has trouble expressing his emotions. That he wouldn’t do that anymore. That he really loves and cares for me.
It’s been 2 weeks since we’ve last communicated.. whenever I see him from my window coming home from work he’s always on the phone now..he was never on the phone before. It must be another woman, or multiple right??
He’s logged into social media often, even when he is allegedly at work. The login status is usually a half hour to an hour last active..all during the day…Does that mean he was being dishonest and playing games when he claimed to not be online looking for other women..or another??
Before, when we got into disagreements and arguments, he was always apologizing profusely, telling me that he loved me and didn’t want to loose me. Begging me to stay. Ringing my phone a lot….
Now..radio silence for 2 weeks.
I feel like he used me to build himself up and dropped me now that he’s feeling confident and confident enough to go after what he wants.
The other day I caved in and called his phone numerous times..each time it would ring a lot and it would cut to voicema, saying that the user mailbox is full…I feel like he blocked me.
I sometimes feel like confronting him, but I think that may be a bad idea. I don’t want him to think that I am desperate and thinking about him.
I’m soo confused and heartbroken. It is extremely difficult moving on…especially living in close proximity to one another.
-
AuthorPosts
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 