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marie

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • #408022
    marie
    Participant

    Dear Anita,

    I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your time and wisdom.  You have been so very helpful and kind.  I am grateful for your advice and I hope others see this and take from it what I have.

    Thank you Marie

    #408010
    marie
    Participant

    That’s a better way of framing it… disappointment.  Now I feel like I have to be the one to do the work to get the friends back. Where do I start?   Do I ignore what happened?  Do we all just move on like it never did happen?

     

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    #408008
    marie
    Participant

    Thank you for your honesty.  I am grateful for your wisdom. The revelation that H was not interested in me ONLY happened after she started seeing F. She had been with a different partner up until the day I left town for the summer, so I never imposed my feelings on her. I did tell friends how I felt, but not her.  You are right no one had to ask me permission… I just would have liked a warning before I walked into this after a summer break.  H KNEW it would hurt me… expressed that to mutual friends, but said she didn’t want to tell me before I came back. I feel that is a betrayal.  She knew she could do something to soften the blow and didnt

     

     

    #408004
    marie
    Participant

    Yes… you could be right.  They probably think I am over reacting.   I know I have to be the one to forgive and move on… but I just don’t feel like it is my fault. Everyone gets to move on and I’m the one betrayed and hurt

     

    #408002
    marie
    Participant

    Yes.   Friends had told her and he told me she always kind of suspected I had feelings for her.   I tell myself I’m not upset about the relationship she has with F.  In fact, I see that she doesn’t value my friendship like I thought she did, which must include respect.  I’m upset that no one told me and now even more upset that the friend circle we had is now hers and I’m out

     

    #408000
    marie
    Participant

    Yes.  You have it right. H knew it would upset me and intentionally did not want to tell me before I got back. She told mutual friends this. I think she had good intentions… she did not want to hurt me… but it ended up hurting me more.  F also knew how I felt and did not say anything. And now the biggest issue is that all of our mutual friends are leaving me out.   F lives with mutual friends and H is my roomate.   It’s a mess all around and I feel like people are choosing her friendship over mine… Like I have to be the one to forgive when I did nothing wrong

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)