I think you might like what he thinks!!! I have never posted on a site before and even though Fatima has problems you spoke to me more. I could feel your despair! today maybe not as much! think about your parents and what you want to be for your children. I had the most wonderful childhood with loving parents but still grew up with low self esteem! confidence I have greatly but am I worthy? loving myself is a major deal for me. I am happily married but almost self destruct as I can’t imagine why he loves me so much as in my head I don’t love myself, so for all my trying to help you I need help myself. I can only believe in myself, thats all I have really. I tell my sister to look in the mirror and see the gorgeous things about her , not the negatives, but find it hard to do myself. I don’t know if you have thought of the medical alternative but a few years ago I was getting divorced from my first husband and I went to my doctor as I wasn’t coping well, he put me on a very mild antidepressant and it helped me so much. I sailed through everything that would normally have really upset me. I look back now at some of the correspondence we had and think wow! was that me as I was so articulate and on the ball and beat him in court. You seem quite intelligent so obviously you have thought of this route? that your seratonin levels may be low? forgive me if I’m way off!!!

Dear Elliot,

Please don’t lose all hope. It is never too late. Look at what you have achieved throughout your life. You got through your teenage years, you survived the factory job all those years, you’ve gone on to create a relationship and have your beautiful children and you still have your job and your home. You sound like quite an amazing guy to me. Why can’t you like yourself more? you don’t have to think your the top guy in everything but please don’t beat yourself up so much, you sound like a master in self flagellation!!!!  ( I do this to myself and then sometimes have to take the rise out of myself for being such an idiot ) don’t be so hard on yourself, give yourself some credit for what you have achieved and give yourself a lot of self love. And what the hell is wrong with being ugly, 7 stone and 5ft tall?????? you are unique. Try to be grateful for what you have and who you are. Well done for looking at Tiny Buddha and asking for help. Keep reading and posting, reading other peoples stories will help you too. Hopefully it will inspire you to do more self help to love yourself more. I myself am not always positive but I try not to let the negative thoughts win. It is my choice which thoughts I take through my day.

Hold on, just take it one day at a time. You will be ok and smile again. You just need to know other people feel like you do and come through it. It’s your life Elliot, don’t let your thoughts take it away from you. Knock that chattering monkey off your shoulder.

I wish you the peace and happiness that you wished Fatima.

Mia