Hi Lily,

Firstly, thanks for sharing. In this particular situation with your partner it seems that he wasn’t all that mature – so I can see why you lost respect for him. As well as this, the fact that he willingly chose to be around people who treated him like their errand boy tells me that he is probably clinging onto what friends he has left! It may be the case of them being higher-ups at his job, which would partially excuse his behavior – however it still seems he is undeniably “beta”, so to speak, so I can empathise with you.

With regard to your previous partners who have been good to you, perhaps you unknowingly search for flaws in each partner to criticise? In my opinion, this does sound quite like a superiority complex – I’m not exactly sure how to go about this other than recommending therapy, like you suggested, however I will say this: next time you find something about someone you don’t like or wish they would change, spend some time reflecting on yourself and where you fall short and could improve. To be cliche, nobody’s perfect. And instead of keeping your partner in the dark about these things, discuss them with him despite how confrontational it may seem, as it will be one of the few ways things could change.

Wishing you luck,

Noah

Stumbled upon this trying to look for how conflict is represented in characters of film… and ended up reading through the entire thread – your situation seemed very dire, I hope all has worked out now!!