fbpx
Menu

Pickles

Forum Replies Created

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #170203
    Pickles
    Participant

    Anita,

    Thank you so much. I agree that he may be using his “hopelessness” to protect himself from being hurt. I think it would be incredibly revealing to find out the source.

     

    #170155
    Pickles
    Participant

    Miney10,

    I’m so sorry you’re going through this.  For me, the details sometimes get in the way of the big picture. He wanted to leave and that’s not your fault. The best thing to do is to let him leave and move on with your life. If he wants to come back to you, he will try but ask yourself if there isn’t something better out there. Break-ups, with as difficult as they are, are also time for growth and opportunity. This is a chance for you to go after all the things you couldn’t have with him. Even if it’s as silly as, for example, “I want to live in the country and he only wants to live in cities”. Go back and think about the reasons why you were incompatible and focus on finding someone or something that you’re more compatible with.

    I hope this helps 🙂

    #170147
    Pickles
    Participant

    Anita,

    He went into some pretty graphic detail about being with another women. It was definitely word vomit, but I was shocked he’d share something so intimate that happened with another person. Granted, it was late at night and he was a bit tipsy. . . While that’s not an excuse, I think that lead to his over-sharing. I want him to be honest and open, but it was a bit much for me.

    To answer your question about past mistakes, he hasn’t gone into detail.  What he shared with me is that he ends up saying something stupid or doing something stupid and hurting the ones he loves. He’s sees himself as insensitive and hopeless. He knows he’s going to make a mistake like this again and is afraid that’s going to drive me away.

    For me, what he said is not unforgivable. I told him that at the time but he was so disgusted with what he had done he was up all night. He said what’s bothering him isn’t specifically related to what he said to me, but his fear that it will happen again and that his insensitivity will ruin this relationship.

    Thanks for listening 🙂

    #170071
    Pickles
    Participant

    Have you talked to your current husband about this?

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)